Horizon Point Consulting

Author: Mary Ila Ward

  • The Surgeon General’s Warning and Professional Development

    The Surgeon General’s Warning and Professional Development

    As I take in my daily dose of news fed to me via email by the New York Times on Saturday, August 31, I’m surprised to see the title: Opinion: Surgeon General: Parents Are at Their Wits’ End. We Can Do Better.  

    Saturday’s Times email blast usually features a more lighthearted piece, especially on a holiday weekend. 

    But as I opened the article, I couldn’t help thinking, “No sh*t!” to what the Surgeon General was saying. You see, I have literally just cleaned up sh*t (Or wait, was it vomit?) off the floor of our bathroom as child number two out of three started with a full round of the stomach bug and didn’t quite make it to the toilet. 

    Such are the “joys”, I guess, as the Surgeon General references in his opinion piece. It is back to school season and everyone is passing around germs. 

    But this is not all that has come during back to school month in a household of three children ages 13,10, and 5. When they are healthy, EVERYDAY at school, everyday of life, demands something. 

    Take for example, the day before the holiday weekend started. One child had to bring a snack for his class that corresponded with the color of the day- black. In case you are wondering, Oreos were a hit for the group of four and five year olds. And don’t forget, he had to wear black too. This is day nine of ten days of the color game where corresponding outfits with the color of the day are a must. We opted for bracelets two of the ten days because I refused to go buy clothes just to meet the color demands of Pre-K. 

    The ten-year-old had student council speeches at 8:15 am the same day. Prior to said speech, this required the speech to be written and turned in for approval and posters to be made. Oh, and a parent form to sign. Of course, it outlined the requirements and obligations of both parent and student for accepting the role of leading the student government of an elementary school. She ran for President and lost, so cue in the emotional support needing to be provided there. This support takes place in between trips to the said toilet with the stomach bug. 

    And the thirteen year old. Well, his struggles have been much like the Surgeon General leads his article with- serious health issues. On this Thursday before the Labor Day holiday, he had just been discharged from an almost week long hospital stay. 

    So, you can see why I was saying “No sh*t!” to the Surgeon General op-ed. It has been a season for our family of intense stress. Honestly, it takes a toll even when someone isn’t hospitalized or throwing up everywhere. 

    The demands for black snacks, constant school events- which nine times out of ten requires you to send money and fill out a form- is ongoing. And let us not forget figuring out how the heck you are going to carve out time to work to pay for all this stuff and get work done (if you are fortunate enough to have the flexibility to leave work) to attend kids activities in and out of school or care for them when they are sick. 

    I have it made, but…

    The Surgeon General and I may not be in identical boats, but we both have it “made” when it comes to the lifestyle we can afford for ourselves and our children. 

    As the first comment I saw of the NYT piece said, “Dr. Murphy had access to top shelf medical care and a supportive workplace. He is very lucky. A lot of parents don’t have these advantages.”  

    I have these advantages too. My husband and I work for ourselves and therefore have a ton of flexibility when it comes to when and where and how we do work. At least one of us can make the 8:15 am student council speech and another the 2:15 carline pick up line because our five year old is too young to go to extended day at the elementary school where he attends. We don’t have to punch a time clock, and we are able to divide and conquer.  

    Our health insurance is uber expensive and not that great of coverage honestly, but we have it. We don’t have to make decisions on whether to access the healthcare system if any of us needs it based on whether or not we can afford it. 

    That doesn’t negate the stress, though, of the 12:08 am email that had to go out to a client the night my son was admitted to hospital to say, last minute, that I wouldn’t be at his facility the next morning given what I described to him vaguely as “a family medical emergency.”  Or the meeting I had to put off twice about starting a new contract with another client with the same vague reasoning. I eventually had to delegate the meeting to a person on my team who I know executed everything beautifully. But it is just another example of the constant- and I mean constant- reshuffling I have to do to try to work- and I’m lucky that it is work I love- and raise kids.  

    I cannot imagine the toll day-to-day parenting takes on the single parent, the parent that can’t leave work or they will be fired, the parent who doesn’t have insurance, and the parent who doesn’t have a village of people around them helping them.

    We’ve been raising kids since the beginning of time. Has it always been this hard? 

    So maybe it is just the way things are today.  Me and peers are making too much of parenting, spending too much time worrying about our kids, engaging them and us in too many activities in and out of school, worried too much about them missing out. Or are we both working when only one of us should? Or are we worried about missing out on every single thing they do because of the comparison and judgment between parents that show up for everything and those that do not?  

    I think since the beginning of time parenting has been stressful. Cue Cain and Abel and that tragedy. I’m sure the death of one son at the hand of the other was pretty stressful for Adam and Eve income, privilege, and societal demands of the time and all aside. The stress of trying to provide the very best care for our children so they can grow up to be healthy adults is not new, and I think it is one all parents have shared since the beginning of time. 

    But there are some things today that are different.  As comments in the NYT article point to, screens and social media do, I think, play a role in the difficulties. They aren’t to blame, but they do play a role. The way the structure of work is misaligned with education and childcare (access and affordability) plays a role. The way we are constantly striving for more, more, more plays a role. And as many of the comments in the NYT Op-Ed point to, this seems to be unique to America. Do kids really need to go on two field trips in one month at school? Do we really need to operate this factory 24/7/365?  The healthcare system, as MANY comments in the NYT article point to, plays a role and adds a lot of stress if and when you have to encounter it. And if you are alive, you will at one point or another. 

    And as I write this last paragraph, my inbox dings with a breaking news alert from the Times, “Four people were killed and at least nine injured in a shooting on the campus of a Georgia high school, the authorities said.”  

    Yeah, there is that stress too.  If I send my kid to school today, are they going to get shot?

    Yes, things are the same as the beginning of time, and yet they are different. 

    So how on earth do I- or people like me who have pretty constant caregiving demands and stress- even think about professional development? 

    We’ve been focused on the importance of professional development on the blog for the last few weeks. We’ve talked about what we’ve been up to for professional development, the ROI of it, and how to do it when you don’t really have a budget for it. 


    But what if you are in a season of life where you just don’t have the time for it or the mental bandwidth to focus on it? Did you notice in the what we’ve been up to for professional development post what I’ve been doing for PD?  Nope, you didn’t. That is because I am not doing a thing! Practicing what I preach I am not.   

    What if you are leading someone or working along someone that is in this season?  Many of which are sandwiched caregivers- caring for growing children and aging parents all at once.  

    Or are you leading someone who really needs to focus on caring for themselves? Or a spouse or other loved one? Let’s face it, everyone has something with varying degrees of intensity and capacity to handle that intensity. 

    As I am contemplating this post while caring for the thirteen year old through his go-round with the stomach bug (yes, it made its way through all of us), I get a text from someone that works with me. I cringe when she says she works “for” me, but I pay her. I’m supposed to be that leader who is focused on the ROI of her professional development. 

    She asks when would be a good time for her to call me. I tell her I’m free and the phone rings shortly after. 

    After checking on us and also talking about her family, she says, “I’m pregnant.”   

    I congratulate her and we talk about some work things. Then, she circles back around to what I know has been on her mind the most. How does she navigate having and raising this child with work? 

    How do I do it? she asks. Well, not really well at the moment I want to tell her!  

    I know she wonders if the same privilege I gave myself of easing back into work after having all three of my kids be afforded to her? Of course it will. Of course. 

    And what about healthcare? Can she get on the company’s family coverage? I reach out to get the benefits plan information from our insurance provider to send to her shortly after we get off the phone. 

    The Surgeon General points to things in his piece like paid parental leave and changes in healthcare to help with the “toll” of parenting. Whereas I don’t think anything he mentions are bad things, my political philosophy inclines me to think that it isn’t the government’s job to alleviate “tolls” we face, but our very own. 

    It is the job of families, employers, and communities to create a healthy society. To help society successfully navigate and mitigate the tolls this life lays on each and every one of us and to revel in the joy that comes with life too. 

    Some of the hard cannot and will not be avoided, but some of it can be made better if we care for and treat each other well. That is where the joy mostly comes from. 

    And, yes, families, employers, and communities need to play an active role advocating for the government to play its role where it should, but we can’t turn a blind eye to the choices we have in each of our roles to make a difference. 

    We can treat people like humans, honor the stage of life they are in, and design a workplace around getting work done and getting it done with excellence while also realizing a person’s productivity may ebb and flow based on where they are in life. And realizing it will really ebb in the wrong direction if we neglect to see the whole person and if we try to treat humans like machines. 

    Some balls bounce and some balls break

    A week or so after the conversation with the pregnancy announcement, we have our monthly one-on-one. We talk through a lot of client work and potential work. It is kind of hectic. We have to call another team member in at one point to talk through an execution plan for a new client. 

    And as we usually do in one-on-ones, we spend some time talking about her professional development within the context of her needs and the company’s needs. 

    I can tell she is concerned about taking on too much during this season of her life where a new child will enter and in her current state where she just doesn’t feel good and she never knows when that may or may not hit. Thus are the joys of growing a human being inside you. 

    I think out loud and I can tell my thinking out loud may be overwhelming her. I even sometimes overwhelm myself with it.  

    So, I stop. I ask her to think about one thing she wants to grow in professionally. Just one.  I can tell she doesn’t want to stall her learning and growth, and she says as much, but she also wants some grace as she navigates what looks like a very different season coming up for her.  

    I don’t want her to stop learning and growing. I want her to continue to grow in her confidence and skills where she can continue to add value to the organization.  But I know she won’t do either of these things if she is overwhelmed. 

    None of us perform at an optimum level when we are overwhelmed. And let’s face it, I’ve been overwhelmed pretty much all year.  What is it the Surgeon General called it? Oh yes, I’m at my “Wits’ End.” 

    So, as I heed advice to her, I heed advice to myself.  What is the one thing I want to grow in?  Not ten things, not three things, one thing.  

    Seasons come and seasons go, and right now the season for both of us is one of intense child-rearing. If I’m honest (and you can probably already tell based on my tone to begin with), I am sometimes resentful of the intensity of this child rearing season that takes me away from a focus on professional growth. 

    But like my colleague said in the same meeting, we have rubber balls and we have glass balls. If we drop a rubber ball, it will bounce. But if we drop a glass ball, it will break.  

    My professional growth and hers will bounce. 

    Our children are glass and we parents will do everything in our power to make sure nothing causes them to break. Sometimes we need help discerning what will help our kids grow and what might break them, just like we do for ourselves. 

    But in this season of life for both of us, we both need something we can claim for ourselves and our own growth, even if it is just one thing. One small thing.  It will, I know, make us better parents to have this one thing to call our own and to have each other to challenge us to do it and not take our eye off that ball, even if it will bounce. 

    The whole person of each of your employees and the value they bring to your organization are glass balls too. What are you doing today to make sure they don’t break? Especially when the Surgeon General is issuing warnings about it? 

    And what are you doing to give them a ball or two to bounce so they learn and grow and continue to add value for themselves and your organization? 

  • How HR Can Actually Use AI

    How HR Can Actually Use AI

    As we wrap up our series on Artificial Intelligence, we’ve learned that AI isn’t as scary as some people make it out to be and that we can use it in a variety of ways- but with some caution- in order to impact our workplaces in a positive manner. 

    We’ve tried to emphasize that AI is best to leverage when: 
    You do the task a lot, 
    It is a manual process, 
    It is prone to human error, therefore:
    It’s time consuming. 
    So if you have the data sources you need and the technology to do it,
    Let AI help. 
    And go do something more value added with the time you save.

    As I’ve wrapped up my personal deep dive into AI for HR, I’ve found our friend Ben Eubank’s book Artificial Intelligence for HR to be a useful tool in framing the technologies that can impact HR by functional area.  Here, I’ll summarize some practical uses by functional areas based on Ben’s insights as well as some of my own.  I’ll also recommend some tools I have seen in action. 

    Workforce Management (Time & Attendance) 

    • Clocking in and out with facial recognition
    • New companies are capturing the market of the uberfication of staffing with AI tools to provide labor on demand to fill gaps in staffing.  Check out Onin Flex as an example. 

    Payroll & Benefits

    • Automating many of the payroll processes and checking for errors that many companies still do manually.  
    • Analyzing pay data for pay parity issues
    • Offering on demand pay. Check out Immediate as an example. 
    • Voice activated and/or chatbot technology to respond to benefit inquiry questions or how employees can perform certain tasks on his/her own. 

    Recruiting/Talent Acquisition

    • Screening resumes by keyword search (you’ve probably been doing this for quite some time) 
    • Take it a step further, once you have your technology query candidates by your filters, have the technology reach out to them to schedule the first step in the selection process
    • Use tools to rediscover applicants and match old candidates for other jobs
    • Use tools to rank candidates and let it learn from your rankings to screen candidates (caution: if you put bias in, you will get bias out)
    • Check out LinkedIn Recruiter that has a variety of features to help identify candidates based on a variety of criteria.  One criteria that I find most interesting (and Ben points this out in his book) is Candidate Receptivity. In other words, how likely will a potential candidate be interested in your opening and company? 
    • Use some pretty cool assessment tools.  One company I’ve been following since 2018 when I met them at the HR Tech conference is Pymetrics.  They are worth checking out.

    Learning and Development and Talent Development and Management

    • There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t hear about the “skills gap”.  It’s a macro issue and an issue at every company with internal talent.  There are tools on the market now that help you understand your internal talent’s skills and then help you hire internally or place people on projects based on skills analysis (Remember, tools like this are only as good as the data you put in them.  If skills aren’t in the database or aren’t accurate, it won’t work.)   A quick google search will give you a list of software tools in this space. 
    • Tools to recommend learning content for users at the individual level and at the organizational level.  Think of your Amazon Recommendation list for learning content. Take a look at page 153 of Ben’s book to understand how this works.
    • Giving leaders tools for coaching based on performance data and feedback so learning content is customized by user.  Voice technology tools that can listen and help coach a manager through specific issues. 
    • Insights to help you better understand correlation and causation between a number of dimensions and employee performance and engagement.  Features can include what if analysis (What if employee engagement rose by X percentage points, how much would turnover decrease?) to sentiment analysis (taking a large amount of qualitative employee survey data, summarizing it and making recommendations for action). 

    Diversity, Equity, Inclusion and Belonging  

    • Identifying biased communication in email, Slack, etc. and in job postings.  Check out Textio as another company I’ve been following since 2018 in this space. Their technology helps with bias and receptivity in job postings and they also have a product for writing better performance feedback.
    • Blind screening tools for recruiting, removing information that would indicate dimensions in which bias may occur. 

    Of course, this isn’t an exhaustive list of things AI is doing in HR, but it is a start. If you are thinking about vetting technology vendors, this may be a good list to begin with by walking through these items and asking, can your technology do this? 

    If it is a comprehensive list HRM system and it can’t do most of these things, or provide API technology to connect to tools that can, you may need to vet other vendors. 

    What functional area in HR are you most interested in leveraging AI technology? 

  • AI and HR- A Series

    AI and HR- A Series

    How would your grandmother state your organizational values? Well, ChatGTP might give you some insights. 

    As I sat down with a client to help them form their values statements after the values mapping session I facilitated, we decided there were a few words that just weren’t right. They were close, but we needed a better word or two, so we stuck what we had into ChatGTP. After various takes on the language, including how your southern grandmother would say it-with of course, several “bless your hearts” thrown in from ChatGTP and some laughter from us- we landed on descriptors that resonated with the behaviors we were trying to articulate through shared language. 

    There is a lot of talk about what AI- Artificial Intelligence-is going to do to this world, or has already done.  Jillian highlighted how it was a focus at the Annual ATD conference in her recent blog post.  As she said, we are all relatively new to it and not very good at it, but think it deserves some attention.  

    Whereas many people want to make AI out to be the next major moral dilemma or our times, the way everyone is going to “cheat” in school and on the job, or what is going to take all our jobs away, I think taking more of a practical approach to what AI is and can do for business, specifically HR deserves some focus. So we are going to spend some time learning and then sharing that learning with you in a series of blog posts. 

    Over the next few weeks, we will be writing about how we and others are using AI to impact HR practices that will hopefully provide insights into how you might use it at work as well. We will talk about the tools being used, give you some thoughts on how it might make you a better practitioner and leader, and provide insights on what we see may be coming next.  

    AI may not be right for your organization just yet, but it may help you get a good laugh in or channel the language of your inner grandmother when you are trying to find just the right words for your next job description, proposal, or values statements.  Or, you could try CanvaAI and let it illustrate your next blog post…. Which illustration do you like better? 

  • Summer is Here – Do You Need a Vacation or a Rhythm?

    Summer is Here – Do You Need a Vacation or a Rhythm?

    Summer is in full swing. The days are long, the kids are out of school, and the office may not be quite as bustling as it usually is whether it’s the physical office space or your email inbox because people are taking vacation. Have you heard of slow productivity?

    I myself just took a long vacation, kicking off the summer for two weeks at the beach, but working intermittently while there. It was a long spring, and for the first time our family was able to check out for more than the standard one week, once a year vacation and get away. 

    While there, I dove deeper into some of Cal Newport’s work around slow productivity. He postulates in his book Deep Work that there are four philosophies for deep work. The type of work you do, your natural disposition, and the season of life you are in all play into which one is best for you. 

    They are: 

    • The Monastic Approach- Eliminate all the shallow work you can to focus deeply on one thing
    • The Bimodal Approach- Create clearly defined stretches for deep work and then back to regular routine for stretches of time
    • The Rhythmic Approach- Daily deep work sessions that occur at consistent times each day
    • The Journalist Approach- Fit in deep work when and where you can. To note, this approach is not for the novice of deep work!

    Watch this cool video to get a good overview of these. 

    While I find something that is appealing in each one of these approaches, you, like me, may not be at a stage in life or working at a place or in a field where one or some of these are realistic. 

    Even though only one approach is called “rhythmic” all of them have some thought of a rhythm tied to them, and it takes some reflection on what rhythms work for you. And these may change overtime.  

    In looking at some of the research as well as my own experience, some thoughts on rhythms emerge to order to do deep work and do it well and consistently: 

    Daily Rhythms- To do your best work: 

    • Break every 50 min to an hour, get up and move around if you work with your mind, sit down and rest if you work with your hands
    • Utilize time blocking techniques to complete tasks that take deep thought; batch work shallow work into a time block to get it done efficiently
    • Honor the “trough” period of the day when your energy is lacking (most people’s is in the early afternoon) by scheduling shallow work or a break during this time
    • For more great thoughts on daily rhythms and the research behind it, read When. 

    Weekly Rhythms– To do your best work: 

    • Take one hour to plan at the beginning of each week (or at the end of the previous week) to map out your “big rocks” for the week and schedule time to get deep work done
    • I like to have one day a week that does not have any meetings or appointments scheduled to focus on deep work and catching up
    • Get a Full Focus Planner to help you with the weekly rhythm and big rock setting

    Monthly to Quarterly Rhythms- To do your best work: 

    • Reflect- What worked and what didn’t in the previous period? Celebrate what did. 
    • Refocus- Chart out goals for the upcoming period and block time for those that may require or need the bimodal approach for deep work if you are lucky enough to have the autonomy to deploy this approach.
    • Again, use the Full Focus Planner to help with this. It operates on a quarterly model so it naturally helps you structure your thinking around reflecting and focusing.

    Yearly Rhythms- To do your best work: 

    • Honor the seasons if your work has periods of intensity and down time and schedule accordingly; deploy the bimodal approach if you can.
    • Our approach at HPC is every three years a sabbatical occurs for deep rest and deep reflection.  This is a period of six to eight weeks of complete time off from work. 

    Overall, rhythms and slow productivity create the opportunity for reflection that helps foster deep and creative work. As the CEO of Airbnb Brian Chesky stated on Adam Grant’s podcast, if you don’t create rhythms, “you’re just on the treadmill and that gets boring and anxiety ridden fairly quickly.” 

    How do you create rhythms in your life to do work and do it well? 

  • Swinging for the Fence to Slow Productivity

    Swinging for the Fence to Slow Productivity

    We swung for the fences and came up short…
    Yeah, you win some, you lose some, it ain’t always home runs
    And that’s just the way life plays…
    Morgan Wallen

    A few years ago, I was facilitating a DiSC training session with one of my colleagues. We use a motivation checklist tied to the DiSC Personality Model to emphasize that different things motivate different people.

    We always encourage people to ask a peer what they think motivates them. Based on the behaviors you observe in another person, “What do you think makes them tick?” is the question we ask. I asked my colleague during the session to comment on what she thought my top two are. 

    She immediately said, “Well one is, ‘Taking on new challenges.’” 

    It wasn’t one of the top two I had marked.  Actually, in going through the checklist, it really wasn’t one I had even considered. 

    But as I reflected, I realized how off my self awareness might be.  She was spot on. I’m always swinging for the fence. On top of that, I very rarely wait patiently for the next pitch. I take on as much as I can, always ready for the challenge of knocking it all out of the park. 

    Too Many Balls 

    Following my sabbatical almost three years ago where I said no to everything for almost eight weeks, I came out refreshed and ready to swing for the fence again. I slowly but surely started picking up balls. One at a time, we added client after client, one of which is sucking the ever living life out of me right now. I picked up volunteer board seat balls. Thinking that the flexibility my husband now had given his change in careers would allow him to help out with the softballs of three kids, I said yes to more. Yes to travel, both personal and professional, yes to training for a marathon. Yes to a 17 year old from Costa Rica living with us. 

    Not only is my disposition to always swing for the fence, I am also always juggling a lot of balls trying to hit them all out of the park. Balls I’m trying to help others hit out of the park. I realized on one random Tuesday in April, I had dealt with ten different people calling me in crisis- or perceived crisis- needing my help. None of them were family, all balls I had picked up doing apparently what I’m good at.  As my husband has said, “I swear you have a sign on your forehead that reads, ‘Please spill your guts to me. I am here to help!’”

    But then a curveball invariably gets thrown. And two softball sized ones- one professional and one personal- hit me like a ton of bricks this spring.

    As I told my team, “I can juggle 18 balls at a time, but throw me 19 with a curve, and I want to drop them all.  It makes me realize maybe 15 balls is where I should have stopped.  I never should have picked up 16, 17, or 18 to begin with.  

    If I had never picked up those three, I could have handled the softballs, but by not stopping before it got to be too much, I seemed to be ill equipped to function given the big two.  

    I immediately went to, ok, sabbatical time again!  I need eight weeks of nothing! 

    Grand Slams

    For our second quarter planning meeting, you better believe “Sabbaticals” was on the agenda.  Unlike last time, everyone saw it and everyone brought it up before it was even time to discuss it. Everyone on the team has been in the business of picking up lots of balls too. We love to play the game, leaning into our mission, but it can get exhausting. 

    At our yearly planning meeting three months prior, we had worked hard to see where everyone was with current projects and what people wanted to grow in and what people wanted to divest in. I had named these things for myself too, already knowing in January that there were some balls that I wanted and needed to throw out.  But sometimes divesting in things takes time.  And I am trying to exit on some of them gracefully.  And I really wanted to equip my team to lead on some things they were capable of doing even better than I could, but there was inevitably some training involved in that. 

    We’d made plans for transitions. I communicated to boards I served on that I would not be serving another term- find a replacement! I’d be done with my bucket list marathon at the end of April. My so-stressful-I-can’t-sleep-at-night looming client issue would come to a peak at the same time and then be easier (or so I thought). 

    But by April, I was ready to say, “Forget gracefully!”  Every ball I’ve got is being thrown to the curb!”  

    “And that’s just the way life plays….”

    Right after this, I find myself heading to Oxford, Mississippi for a Morgan Wallen concert. You see, he is my daughter’s favorite musician. For Christmas, we had surprised her with tickets to his concert at Ole Miss in April. At the time, I wasn’t aware of how difficult the time between Christmas and April would be. The last ball I really wanted to have to juggle over that weekend was to be away from home again. 

    But she was ecstatic, and we weren’t going to miss it. After four hours in the rain listening to not one, not two, but three opening acts, he finally came on stage. A few songs in, he transitioned to my daughter’s favorite song, ‘98 Braves.  

    I felt the slow creep of the lyrics speaking to me:

    We swung for the fences and came up short…
    Yeah, you win some, you lose some, it ain’t always home runs
    And that’s just the way life plays…

    The personal issue got even more pronounced while I was gone.  The client issue came to a head right after I got back, and it was shared with me that it would get even more intense over the summer and into the fall. 

    Again, the thought, just throw the balls away. All of them. Quit swinging.

    Then, as I was unwinding the evening after my client engagement, I got a call from my husband. “He’s hit a grand slam! Cortez hit a grand slam!!” Drew was almost in tears. Our brown eyed boy who after seven years of baseball with us, had finally hit one over, and a grand slam at that!  His mother was in tears, I was in tears.  

    Seasons of Life 

    It takes some time for me to moderate the pendulum swings in my life. I preach moderation, but I often don’t practice it. And when I’m swinging for the fence all the time with too many balls, I get to a breaking point. I want to quit. 

    But, as I reflected I realized, I think I’m entering a season in my life where I can begin to honor the seasons of the game.  

    As Emily Freeman says so aptly, “Just because things change doesn’t mean you chose wrong in the first place. Just because you’re good at something doesn’t mean you have to do it forever.”  

    I’ve realized I’m in the season now where I would rather see someone else hit home runs. I get more joy and satisfaction from the win a teammate gets than I do experiencing it for myself. Like the speaking gig they are invited to instead of me. Like the colleagues who are about to land a very big fish or two that could substantially change their income (we pay a commission on business anyone lands) at a season in life where income is being sucked out like a vacuum. Kids in college ain’t cheap. For someone else to serve in that board role and learn.  

    It used to be that if our brown eyed boy was going to make it to a game or a practice or anything for that matter, we were going to have to take him.  After almost seven years, his mom takes him to most things now. She has stepped up to the plate and she is helping him knock it over the fence. It is a joy to see the evolution of their journey. 

    Most importantly, there is no greater joy than to see my kids well and excelling. Although Cortez isn’t our biological child, his successes and my three biological kids’ successes are more important to me than almost anything. Faith’s- our Costa Rica 17 year old- successes are important to me. The wonderful team I get to work with everyday at HPC are all so important to me.  And when I say successes, hitting a real grand slam isn’t what I mean, although the hard work and commitment that goes into hitting them is. 

    I’m ready to throw the balls for others to hit, not hit them myself. And I’m ready to be happy with a single, especially if it knocks in another run.  I’m not ready to stop stepping up to the plate or step up to the mound, I just need to modify my game plan. 

    And maybe you do too. 

    “When we want to give up, maybe what we need to do is open the door to doing things differently, not doing something different all together. “

    Mary Ila Ward

    “Slow Productivity” 

    For me, doing things differently is looking like a shift from choosing an all or nothing pace. A pace defined by what Cal Newport describes in his book titled the same as “Slow Productivity”.  His key pillars include: 

    • Focus on fewer things
    • Work at a natural pace
    • Obsess over quality

    Maybe I’ll take a sabbatical before 2024 is over, maybe I won’t (everyone else on the HPC team will be taking one in 2024-2025). I will be taking the summer to practice slow productivity, where I focus on the fewer balls that matter, namely, helping others succeed at the game, working at a pace that is more reasonable by saying no to the things that aren’t for me in this season, and by obsessing over the quality of relationships that are most important to me. 

    What Really Matters?

    In that same DiSC training, where I realized my self-awareness was totally off the mark in the challenges I take on, I also realized maybe I wasn’t totally self-aware illiterate. 

    The second motivator my colleague picked for me was, “Helping other people succeed.”  I had picked this one too. 

    I think my swinging for the fence can get in the way of me helping other people succeed sometimes. Especially people closest to me. It comes from a motivation to take on new challenges coupled with a desire to fix things. I’m looking forward to watching others hit it out of the park- by throwing the ball well, taking the bunt to advance the runner in front of me, or simply cheering from the stands- realizing that taking on challenging situations may just come in the form of helping others put in the work and patiently waiting seven years or more for the dividends to come.