Horizon Point Consulting

Category: Beyond Work

Beyond Work is our line of resources for people and community leaders looking for something new and innovative outside, be it a new job, career change, or personal development outside of work.

  • Put Your Phone Away: The 1 Best Piece of Advice for Today’s Adults and Teens?

    Put Your Phone Away: The 1 Best Piece of Advice for Today’s Adults and Teens?

    I’ve been asked to speak to a group of high school student leaders this week.  I’m always open to almost any topic the organizers want me to cover that I have expertise in.  In this case, what started off as a talk about communication skills morphed into talking about building confidence. The adult leader said that she felt as though this was a challenge for most youth of today.  

    I see this point and also see where there are a variety of factors contributing to it. One factor that I see related to both challenges in communication skills and confidence is the frequency of time that youth (and adults) spend on their phones.  

    I consider this a note to myself as much as it is advice in general, but the phone has become what I call the marshmallow of our times.  

    Remember the marshmallow study in the 1970s which showed that children who were able to delay gratification and wait to get two marshmallows instead of one were shown to be more successful by a variety of measures? As stated in this article:  

    The children who were willing to delay gratification and waited to receive the second marshmallow ended up having higher SAT scores, lower levels of substance abuse, lower likelihood of obesity, better responses to stress, better social skills as reported by their parents, and generally better scores in a range of other life measures. (You can see the follow-up studies here, here, and here.)

    I’m not one to say that any piece of technology is the source of all evil, but when used to an extreme, which is what it has become for many, the modern cell phone has become:

    1. A source of instant gratification (the marshmallow) that we can’t seem to put down or delay looking at.  
    2. It is has become a way to avoid direct communication with people. 
    3. It has become a way in which youth especially judge their self-worth through social media and other online interactions that aren’t based on reliable or useful sources for building self-worth and confidence.   
    4. All of which I believe is leading to lower confidence levels (among other negative things) in youth and adults.  
    5. Which then leads us all to fall victim to not shining our light in the way that positively reflects the talents, abilities, and gifts we have to offer, further thwarting self-confidence.  

    In the marshmallow study, the same article cites environmental factors that affect a child’s ability to have self-control and delay gratification, namely if they have been in situations where adults don’t follow through on what is promised.  This leads children to be conditioned to not believe that the second marshmallow will ever come (maybe their parents are on their phone and that’s why they don’t follow through?).  

    But the article emphasizes that we can cultivate behavioral patterns that help us delay gratification (put the phone down) and build our own confidence levels: 

    You and I can do the same thing. We can train our ability to delay gratification, just like we can train our muscles in the gym. And you can do it in the same way as the child and the researcher: by promising something small and then delivering. Over and over again until your brain says, 1) yes, it’s worth it to wait and 2) yes, I have the capability to do this.

    Building the muscle of putting down the phone when it isn’t necessary can help build confidence and patience in us all.

    Some ideas to do this:  

    1. Commit to putting up your phone in certain environments, situations, or times of the day.  Just like going to the gym at a routine time, find routine situations and times where the phone is off limits.  This exercises your self-control and patience.  
    2. Intentionally engage in face-to-face conversations with your peers and family at regular intervals. Commit as a group to put your phone up during certain times and interactions. 
    3. Take social media apps off your phone that you find yourself spending too much time on and/or ones that you can tell sabotage your self-confidence.  If you find the social media outlet as one in which you are constantly comparing yourself to others or you find yourself putting off doing more important and life-fulfilling things (things that build your gifts and build relationships) because you are constantly on the app, this is a clear sign it is eroding your confidence. Remove it. Use the time you would normally devote to your phone engaging in activities and relationships that help your light to shine. This produces a double boost in self-confidence. It removes that which is diminishing your confidence and focus on activities that build skills and abilities leading to a strong sense of self-worth and fulfillment.  This skill-building and confidence can then end up impacting others in a positive way too.

    I find it hard when speaking to youth not find a way to incorporate this clip from the movie Coach Carter into my talk.  So somehow in talking about cell phones, marshmallows, communication, and confidence, I’ve found myself back in a place where this clip conveys a most important message that we all need a reminder of from time to time. 

    Please don’t hide your light behind the glow of your phone.   

  • Sometimes You Will Fail, And That’s Okay

    Sometimes You Will Fail, And That’s Okay

    “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try, try again.”

    During a recent conversation with a client, he raised a concern about his leadership team expecting him to make every decision. The previous leadership set that expectation, but he wants to empower his team to make decisions they are capable of making.

    The conversation reminded me of when my children were younger and learning new skills, like riding a bike. My youngest is very headstrong and lacks patience (he doesn’t take after his mother at all). If he doesn’t get it right the first time, he’s quick to say “I can’t.”  

    One of the best mentors I ever had, who just happened to be my first boss in HR, empowered me while still providing me with the guidance I needed as a new HR practitioner. Whenever I brought him an issue, he would ask me what I thought I should do. Eventually, I learned to come prepared with those possible solutions. Together we would weigh the options and determine which route to take. The longer I worked for him, the easier it became for me to determine what I needed to do to resolve a situation. And in the end, I learned to make those decisions on my own and simply inform him of how I intended to handle it.

    I have a client that is experiencing a high level of change in their organization and as part of that change, I helped them lead an interactive workshop with their staff. When reviewing the potential outcomes of the feedback received during the workshop, I was very transparent with the group. Their feedback will guide change and the success of that change will be measured. Some of those measurements will show that the change is effective, but some is going to show that the change isn’t effective. And that’s okay. It means that we go back to the table. We reevaluate the plan and determine if we need to adjust to get the desired results. Or we decide that the plan isn’t the right one and we start over from scratch. Many of them looked a little shocked that I admitted that we will fail.

    Failure isn’t a bad thing, as long as you learn from it and grow from it. Just as parents tell their children, as long as you learn from your mistakes, you are still succeeding.  

    By mentoring employees to assess issues and come up with possible solutions, eventually, they will take that initiative without even having to think about it. And they will grow more confident in their ability to formulate those solutions and implement them. And in turn, they will empower their own employees and the impact will continue to trickle down the ladder and the entire team will become more effective, more cohesive, and more productive.

    Do you empower your employees to create solutions? Do you support them when they fail?

  • Create Insights Instead of Giving Feedback

    Create Insights Instead of Giving Feedback

    “….But the most helpful advice is not a painting. It is instead a box of paints and a set of brushes. Here, the best team leaders seem to say, take these paints, those brushes, and see what you think you can do with them. What do you see, from your vantage point? What picture can you paint?” from Nine Lies About Work

    A few weeks ago, we talked about how neuro research shows us that for learning to happen, insights have to be created. We talk a lot about giving and receiving feedback in the workplace and how necessary it is.   But what if it is more important to create insights than to give positive or negative feedback?

    What’s the difference? Feedback is about you telling people what you think and giving them the path forward from that in most cases.  Insights are people discerning what they think.

    Research shows us that people are more likely to act on what they think not what you think because insight is brain food which creates dopamine which makes us feel good. (When was the last time traditional feedback gave you a shot of dopamine?)

    So as a leader, creating insights may be the better way to get the results you need rather than trying to give feedback.

    How do you do it though? Our previous post suggests some ways. There are also some helpful ways in Nine Lies About Work by Marcus Buckingham and Ashley Goodall.   Their “insights” suggest focusing on the 1) past 2) present and 3) future and all revolved around asking good questions, not giving good answers*.

    1. Start with the Present: Ask, “What three things are working right now?” For more on this, especially when utilizing it for change management purposes, read here.
    2. Revisit the Past: Ask, “When you had problems/situations like this in the past, what did you do that worked?”
    3. Finish with the Future: Ask, “What do you already know you need to do? What do you know already works?”

    My little girl loves to paint and draw. Often, she asks me to help her draw something. We’ve been on a heart drawing kick lately. The first few times, I’ve drawn a heart on a page or a canvas for her to color or paint in. But then I stopped doing it and just left her to it. What I discovered was that her own hearts were better than anything I could have ever helped her create.  I just need to provide the tools and she can do the rest better than I can.

    How are you providing the right tools and asking the right questions in order to give people the opportunity to grow?

    *Nine Lies About Work is an insightful book linked to a lot of research. The way they phrase the nine lies, though, may just be a matter of semantics, so don’t let the titles of the lies fool you. Read the context in the chapters. In this case, you may be giving feedback in the form of creating insights.  Don’t take this to mean you need to scratch giving feedback. Just make sure you do it in a way that leads to learning and engagement instead of in a way that leads to disengagement. For more, read the book on how to do this.

  • What’s on Your Career Bucket List?

    What’s on Your Career Bucket List?

    The end of the school year brings final exams, award ceremonies, parties, and best of all, summer. My boys have been counting down the days. And with their countdown comes the usual question I face every year.

    “What are we doing this summer?”

    I always try to do fun things with them throughout the summer that they will each enjoy. But with three boys ranging from 9 to 15, that’s not always easy. Their interests don’t always match up. What my nine-year-old finds thrilling, my fifteen-year-old finds more boring than watching paint dry.

    So this year, I’m putting the decision making in their hands. I’ve tasked each of them with creating a summer bucket list. The parameters are:

    • Something we can all do together.
    • Nothing really over the top cost wise.
    • Things that can be done in a day (no more than a two-hour drive one way).
    • At least four items on each of their lists needs to be educational.

    I’ve also asked each of them to give me at least three longer trips they’d like to take. Together we’ll pick one.

    Our Leaders as Career Agents training helps employees create a career bucket list. Participants are asked where they want to be in their careers in one, three, five, and ten years. Then they are asked to set goals that will help them get there.

    Goals need to be SMART. Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Time-based.

    A Harvard Business study showed that only 17% of participants set goals, and only 3% of those actually wrote down their goals. The 14% who had goals in mind were ten times more likely to be successful than those who didn’t set goals. And the 3% who wrote down their goals were even more successful.

    Setting goals is only the first step in succeeding. I recently read an article about goal setting that made a great point. View your goals in terms of “I am” instead of “I will.” Focus on how am I going to start taking action to achieve the goal now versus I’ll work on achieving the goal at some point.

    Find ways to keep your goals front and center. A few years ago my sister-in-law decided to lose some weight. To keep her goal in mind and help keep her from cheating on her diet, she found a picture of herself before she gained the extra weight and stuck it on her refrigerator door to remind herself what she was working towards. In the context of your career, it may mean having regular performance meetings with your manager or finding a mentor in your organization that can help you achieve your goals. It may mean blocking out time on your calendar each week to work on your goals.

    So where do you see yourself in a year, or ten? And how are you going to get there?

  • 3 Ideas to Help Your Recruiting Efforts

    3 Ideas to Help Your Recruiting Efforts

    In our last post, we discussed strategies for retaining talent in a difficult labor market.  Hopefully, you’ve focused efforts there, but most likely, you also need to figure out the best ways to recruit talent.

    Here are some ideas for doing so:

    1. Expose Yourself! Exposure is a key problem in attracting talent, especially for B2B companies.  Developing programs that expose people in the community to your company and jobs are important. We aren’t all Apple and Google.

    You can do this through partnership with schools in your area, marketing campaigns, involvement in community and charitable endeavors and by giving your employees tools to talk about your company in the community in a positive way.  An employee referral program may be a good strategy related to this.

    Work with your marketing department to create a communications plan for exposure in your primary geographic area(s) for recruitment.


    2. Look for talent in all the “wrong” places.  Explore looking for talent that you may not have ever considered before.  Here are a few areas to consider and resources and ideas to connect with these populations:

    • Individuals with criminal records.  There is a significant national movement to hire those with prior backgrounds.  Many organizations fear doing this, but there are multiple reasons do so in the right context.  Check out these resources:

    Getting Talent Back to Work

    70 Million Jobs

    • “Stay-at-home” moms or moms that have left the workforce to raise children and are now wanting to return.  This could also include people who have left the workforce to care for people other than their children.

    The Mom Project

    JPMorgan Chase ReEntry Program

    • The “retired” or “semi-retired”.

    AARP Resources  

    • Outsource. Contractors, consulting firms and/or freelancers may be the best way to get work done.

    72 Best Freelance Sites

    Oftentimes when you connect with diverse talent pools, you see that you need to think differently about how jobs may be structured.  Not everything requires a traditional FTE. Some of your best and most productive workers just may be a shift in mindset away.

    3. Reevaluate your wages.  More on this here. I’ll be speaking on this at SHRM19 in Las Vegas at 10:45 am on Tuesday, June 25th, so if you’re there, come join me for an in-depth dive on this.

    What is one thing you can do today to boost your recruiting efforts?