Horizon Point Consulting

Author: Jillian Miles Massey

  • Bring Me a Rock

    Bring Me a Rock

    My husband has a great analogy for ineffective communication that goes like this: 

    It’s like when they say, “Bring me a rock”. You go outside, grab the first rock you see, and take it to them. They say “No, we need a different rock.” You go back outside, grab a different rock, take it back, and they say “No, not that rock. It needs to be gray.” And so on and so forth until you eventually figure out that they wanted a big, round, gray rock from the bottom of the Mississippi River. How were you supposed to know that? If they knew what they wanted, why didn’t they just say it? 

    When people experience this type of interaction over and over again, they become less trusting and less engaged with the work. They start to feel like nothing they ever do will be the right thing, because it’s never clear what the right thing actually is. It’s a very demotivating work environment where accountability is high and psychological safety is not: the anxiety zone.

    We should all be working to find the right balance between accountability and psychological safety. In other words, we can absolutely have high standards of performance and a people-first, inclusive culture. I call this Graceful Accountability. 

    If you’ve heard me talk about Graceful Accountability, you know I’m serious about it. I’ve seen countless healthy and unhealthy teams over the years, and the difference is almost always the result of either too much “speak up” or too much “do what we tell you to do”. It’s either so relaxed and accepting that results suffer, or it’s so structured and rigid that people suffer. When we practice Graceful Accountability, we reset the balance. 

    Next time you need someone to bring you a rock, meet them in the middle – figure out what it is you really need and communicate those expectations clearly (accountability), then allow space for questions, discussion, and gratitude (psychological safety). 

    What are you doing now to find the right balance of accountability and psychological safety? 

    —

    Attending the UA HR Conference? Catch Jillian’s session October 27th at 11am. Learn more about #UAHR22 at horizonpointconsulting.com/whatsup. 

  • Are You (or Someone You Know) a Jerk at Work?

    Are You (or Someone You Know) a Jerk at Work?

    We’re fortunate to work with hundreds of different people across industries and state lines, and we learn something new with each project and grow personally from every relationship. We also hear many, many stories about bad managers and toxic coworkers. Back in 2019, Lorrie addressed the question, Are Your Top Employees Also Your Most Toxic?. 

    When I’m facilitating leadership or communication training, I often get the feedback, “I think I can try these strategies and behaviors with most of my coworkers, but what do I do with someone who is just a jerk?”. If we have the opportunity for more conversation, I can usually help get to the root of the behavior and suggest a strategy or two. Sometimes I just have to shrug my shoulders and say, “I’m sorry, that’s tough”. It really stinks when I feel like I can’t help.

    A few weeks ago, I discovered Jerks at Work: Toxic Coworkers and What to Do About Them by Tessa West, and I am here to sing praises! Tessa, an Associate Professor of Psychology at New York University, defines seven types of work jerks and how to deal with them. She also provides three practical resources:

    • Am I a Jerk at Work? (take this quiz online!)
    • Am I an Effective Ally? (take this quiz online!)
    • What Type of Jerk Do I Have at Work?

    I took both quizzes, and not only did I get clear insight into my results, the quizzes themselves challenged me to think critically and honestly about how I would respond in real-life scenarios. 

    Here’s Tessa’s definition of an Ideal Coworker: 

    Even in tough situations, you try to take the perspective of others. When there’s conflict at work, you don’t run and hide. Instead, you have difficult conversations, even if it means finding out a thing or two about yourself that you don’t like.

    In groups, you’re willing to lead without dominating conversations and agendas. As a boss, you’re careful not to fall into micromanagement traps. When you feel overwhelmed you accept help, have your direct reports prioritize work, and figure out what projects need the most attention.

    Do you see yourself in that description? What about your direct supervisor? If you have direct reports, do you think they view you this way? 

    Let’s look at Tessa’s definition of the Effective Ally: 

    You respond to jerk at work behavior with a combination of appropriate confrontation and advice-giving. You realize that the solution to jerks at work is to form allies at work, and you’re quick to help victims find the right people to buffer and protect them. Grand, public gestures of support are not your style. If confrontation is called for, you prefer one-on-one meetings. You realize that public shaming rarely gets you to where you want to be. Instead, you use tactics aimed at reducing conflict rather than exacerbating it. You prefer open and honest communication between those who are involved as an initial strategy.

    Often you find yourself in a mediator role, helping two people with conflict work it out. Boss’s love having you around because you know how to ease interpersonal tensions without creating the appearance of taking sides. If you aren’t a leader already, there’s a good chance you will be some day.

    Same questions as before: Do you see yourself in that description? What about your direct supervisor? If you have direct reports, do you think they view you this way?

    Jerks at Work defines seven types of toxic coworkers, including four specific types of toxic bosses. For each type, Tessa provides “sneaky behaviors to watch out for”, specific strategies to try, and insight for bosses to help prevent toxic behaviors on teams in the first place. I won’t spoil the reveal for you, but suffice to say, you will see people you know in this book. It might even be you. 

    I’ll leave you with this excerpt from the book’s conclusion: 

    For most of us, sustained conflict at work causes stress and anxiety and interferes with our ability to get stuff done…[None of the] strategies I recommend in this book cost a million dollars, or hours and hours of precious time, to implement…Jerk-at-work problems can be the death of a team. And luckily for you and me, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to solve them. It’s about looking out for warning signs, understanding why someone behaves the way they do, and learning how to open the lines of communication so you can solve the problem quickly and with as little stress as possible. That way you have time for real rocket science.

    At the end of the day, we all want to do meaningful work alongside people who support us. No one wants to deal with jerks at work. But sometimes we have to. And sometimes we find that we are the jerks ourselves. Are you (or someone you know) a jerk at work?

  • Feed Your Future With Feedback & Feedforward

    Feed Your Future With Feedback & Feedforward

    Next week, I’m talking about Feedback and Feedforward at the Tennessee SHRM Conference. While preparing for this session, I’m reflecting on my own feedback and feedforward skills. Am I following my own advice in giving meaningful feedback and practicing feedforward? If I do receive input from others, am I following up and actually implementing any change? Are you? 

    Just this morning, I received (unsolicited) feedback from my husband that I have not been practicing what I preach in work-life balance. I enjoy my work, paid and volunteer, so much that I have found myself with a plate that isn’t just full…it’s spilling over. Now I have my own homework to do to take this feedback to heart and actually examine my schedule and commitments. 

    Have you received similar feedback? That is, unsolicited feedback? Let’s talk about the types of feedback: 

    Unsolicited – The Kind You Didn’t Ask For

    Solicited – Well, You Asked For It 

    Observation – It’s Not What They Said, It’s How They Said It

    How often do you actually solicit feedback? For most of us, that type of feedback is the least common. We typically receive unsolicited feedback and/or observe feedback behaviors. Why? It is a whole lot easier to see our problems in others than it is to see them in ourselves. Even though we may be able to deny our problems to ourselves, they may be very obvious to the people who are observing us. 

    We can probably all work on soliciting feedback and actually listening to it. Today, since I already know an area that I need to work on, I’m thinking about the practice of Feedforward. Here’s how it works: 

    1. Pick a behavior you want to change that would make a significant, positive difference in your life
    2. Describe what you want to change with someone (one-on-one)
    3. Ask the person for two suggestions for the future
    4. Listen attentively to the suggestions
    5. Thank them

    Feedforward is a smart, effective way to take action and have accountability for the change you’re working on. 

    I’ll leave you with this quote from Marshall Goldsmith in his book What Got You Here Won’t Get You There:

    “We’re being told all day long how we’re doing. And the reason we accept this feedback and actually attempt to respond to it (e.g., if we’re down in sales, we’ll try harder to bring the figures up) is that we accept the process: An authority figure “grades” us and we are motivated to do better because of it. It’s not like that with interpersonal behavior, which is vague, subjective, unquantifiable, and open to wildly variant interpretations. But that doesn’t make it less important. It’s my contention— and it’s the bedrock thesis of this book— that interpersonal behavior is the difference-maker between being great and near-great, between getting the gold and settling for the bronze.”

    Use our free resource – Practice Feedback & Feedforward Worksheet – to check in with yourself and others and set timely goals for improvement and mutual commitment. 

    How can you feed your future? 

    Attending the TN SHRM Conference? Catch Jillian’s session on September 13 at 3:15pm. Learn more about #TNSHRM22 at horizonpointconsulting.com/whatsup. 

  • How to Develop Inclusive Training

    How to Develop Inclusive Training

    When was the last time someone asked you how you prefer to learn? Has someone ever asked if you need assistive technology? 

    As a trainer and facilitator, I definitely miss the mark sometimes on inclusive training. It’s hard. There’s no way around it; it’s not easy to design or deliver training in a language, structure, platform, etc. that works well for every learner. It’s hard, but it’s so important to try. 

    There is robust research out there about learning styles, learner variability, and inclusive curriculum design. Let’s look at this excerpt from research about Universal Design for Learning (UDL), a “framework to improve and optimize teaching and learning for all people based on scientific insights into how humans learn”. 

    UDL is based on the premise that learner variability is the norm. UDL researchers emphasize that there is no “average” or “typical” learner and that all learners have varied abilities, strengths, experiences, and preferences… aspects that can be dynamic and changing depending on one’s context and development… 

    As an instructional design framework, UDL provides a structure to proactively build in supports that address the learner variability that exists within any group. Taking learner variability into account, the process of planning instruction in alignment with UDL guidelines allows educators to consider and integrate flexible and supportive options that are helpful for all learners from the outset. 

    UDL-based instruction can make existing educational practices more inclusive, by providing support to a wider range of learners.  

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    Here is a graphic from CAST, the creators of UDL, that outlines the three major components of UDL and questions to ask yourself as a trainer or educator:

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    What is your team doing to acknowledge and understand different learning styles? How are you accommodating differences? 

    One great, free resource for understanding learning styles is The VARK Questionnaire. This is a free, simple quiz that anyone can take on a smart device. VARK stands for Visual, Aural, Read/Write, and Kinesthetic – the four primary learning styles. The quiz measures a person’s preferences for each style and includes a Multimodal Style for those of us who prefer to learn through more than one method. 

    VARK also provides free insights, such as “How can VARK help my Business?” and “Using VARK in Online Learning”.  

    Once we understand the instructional design piece, we need to think about inclusive training from a participant perspective. Who’s in the room? Is it only top leadership? Only junior managers? A combination? 

    Here’s research to consider from the NeuroLeadership Institute about “everyone-to-everyone” learning, a practice that shifts the paradigm of traditional training to a model that allows all team members to engage with learning at the same time.  

    Because social norms are based on the assumption that everyone else is doing something, if people aren’t engaging in the new behavior — which is likely in a company of 10,000 people if only 100 of them learned new habits — they’ll continue to engage in old, undesired behaviors since that’s what they see.

    A better approach is what we call ‘everyone-to-everyone learning’.

    In this model, the entire organization goes through the same learning experience at the same time. Instead of day-long or multi-day, in-person workshops — which can’t be administered to all employees at once without bringing the organization to a standstill — learning consists of memorable, bite-sized sessions delivered virtually.

    Simply put, you’re able to shift from a model of teaching a few people a lot slower to teaching a lot of people a little bit very quickly. And at an organizational level, this ends up being far more effective.

    Is everyone-to-everyone learning something you can implement? Could this model be adapted for your organization’s structure and needs? 

    Ultimately, it’s not easy to design learning for everyone, but it’s important to do the work and make our best effort at inclusive training. Talk to your team about their preferences and needs, and do some research and experiment. Be the first domino!  

     

  • Benefits Benchmarks: North Central Alabama

    Benefits Benchmarks: North Central Alabama

    A few weeks ago, I asked the question “Are Employees Utilizing Those New Perks?” and highlighted benchmarking as a critical activity for evaluating workplace benefits. Now, we have the published results from the 2022 North Central Alabama Wage & Benefit Survey!

    First up, Average Benefit-Cost Per Employee (Annual) increased 25% over 2021. Employers reported an average of $16,608 spent annually per employee in benefits, compared to $12,459 one year ago. Some hot categories for increased benefits spending are Child Care Support, Adoption Support, Pet Insurance, and Elder Care Support. These types of benefits are increasingly attractive, and the Huntsville/Madison County Chamber Foundation is now providing the Best Place for Working Parents® program in recognition of companies that are focusing on family care.  

    Next up, 72% of companies are now offering a PTO (Paid Time Off) structure in place of set hours/days for Sick Leave, Vacation, etc. Last year, only 58% were using a PTO structure. This shift aligns with increases in Flex Time and Remote/Telework benefits as options to give some autonomy back to employees. If you’re thinking about shifting your Leave and/or PTO policies, look for a blog post coming soon from Mary Ila Ward on Flexibility and Unlimited PTO. 

    Paid Family/Parental Leave is more available, with a 17% increase in the number of employers offering any amount of leave designated specifically for family/parental leave. The median leave times in weeks jumped from 2 weeks to 4 weeks.  

    If you are in the North Central Alabama Region, how do your benefit offerings stack up against these benchmarks? 

    If you are outside of this region, where can you find local data? Check with your local Economic Development Agency and/or Chamber of Commerce to find out if local data is available. 

    Benchmark, benchmark, benchmark! 

    This wage survey covers Cullman, Lawrence, Limestone, Madison, and Morgan Counties in Alabama and represents 132 company respondents in 2022. Learn more here.