Horizon Point Consulting

Category: Personal Development

We all need a little personal development mixed in with our professional and career development. Read blogs in this category for stories and best practices for personal wellness and wellbeing, skills improvement, and  more.

  • The Year of Authenticity

    The Year of Authenticity

    2016 was the “Year of Stories.” 2017 was the “Year of Innovation.” And whereas these themes for 2016 and 2017 at Horizon Point were determined at the conclusion of both years, on January 7, 2018, I already determined that “2018 Is the Year of Authenticity.”

    Why?

    Well, because I didn’t spend much time in 2017 living authentically. I was too distracted. Too busy. And throughout the year of doing lots of leadership training, teambuilding, coaching, and just having lots of conversations with people, it seems as though I’m not the only one that struggles with living authentically.

    2017, in large part, was the year I spent becoming something I swore I would never be. Our doctor friend talks about it often, when women in their mid-thirties (I turned 34 in December) come in to his office wanting a diagnosis of some kind for how they are feeling. They seem to have it all, but because of a conglomeration of things, they are wallowing in misery and want to find a place to place the blame. Where a pill can be prescribed to fix it all.

    Although I never saw a doctor in 2017, looking for a diagnosis related to how I felt, and maybe I should have, (I did see several for a lump that turned out to just be “density”). I do believe for myself and for many women my age, the cause of this is a lack of authenticity.

    The problem comes from a lack of being true to oneself amid trying to be everything to everyone else, accompanied by the feeling that none of the doing is noticed and/or appreciated.

    2017 was a year of tension. One in which business was growing, my children blossoming, but stress was all around in balancing these two important parts of my life, which led to neglecting some others. I fought with the two people closest to me more than I ever have, began to wake up in the middle of the night not being able to turn my brain off (I’ve never had a problem sleeping) and I felt like everything I was doing was out of a sense of obligation, not enjoyment.

    I knew something was wrong mid-year when all I wanted to do was escape (to where, I don’t know) and my husband told me, “One of the things I love most about you is your confidence. Where has it gone?” In seeking to help everyone else live with confidence, I had somehow lost my own.

    So, I’m committed in 2018 to being authentic, and helping others lead with authenticity. To that end, here is what I believe leads to an authentic life:

    1. The Practice of Listening. First, listen to yourself so you can then listen better to others around you.  And listening requires quiet and stillness.
    2. Living in Gratitude. For out of a place of gratitude comes the ability to see all things for what they are.
    3. The Ability to Not Do Things Out of Obligation But Instead Out of Joy. This means saying no so you can say yes to what matters and what uniquely makes you you.
    4. The Ability to Be Vulnerable. You and I don’t have it all together, no one does. And out of the realization of this comes the ability to connect to others.
    5. The Ability to Not Compare Yourself to Others.   

    I’m focusing on these points this year. I’ll talk next week about how I think they can best be cultivated and practiced and I hope you’ll join me in living some of these practices as we embark on authentic living in 2018.

    Like this post?  You may also like:

    Saying “No” to Something is Saying “Yes” to Something Else

    Real Leadership

  • 2017 Book of the Year

    2017 Book of the Year

    “Being original doesn’t mean being first. It just means being different and better.”

    Adam Grant, Originals

     

    Most of us strive to be better.  Few of us strive to be different.  But what if being different is a requirement for being better? For being an original? Turns out that to take better beyond just ourselves, we have to be both.  We have to be non-conformists in order to move the world, according to Adam Grant, author of Originals.

    And because our goal at Horizon Point is to build a better workplace through innovative people practices, we’ve chosen Originals, our 2017 Book of the Year.

     

    The book teaches how to become an original by:

    1. Taking calculated risks. We think most innovative people have risk-taking in their DNA, but it turns out there are some guardrails around risk taking when it comes to the most successful innovators.

    2. Embracing failure.  Failure that leads to innovation comes from quantity of ideas not necessarily quality.

    3. Embracing diversity of thought.  For more on this: Diversity and Inclusion In My Eyes and In the Eyes of My Children.

    4. Speaking up. You can’t be original if your ideas don’t get translated.  This requires voice.  More on this here.

    5. “Passionately procrastinating”.  For more on this: Leaders, Set Manageable Goals to Lead and Run Well.

    6. Converting your enemies. Your actual enemies. Not your frienemies. There is a great example in the book to describe the difference.

    7. Building commitment through purpose.  

    8. Getting over yourself. The ego, especially an inflated one, gets someone who could have all these other characteristics nowhere. Being authentic is required to be an original.

     

    “In the quest for happiness, as Grant writes, “many of us choose to enjoy the world as it is. Originals embrace the uphill battle, striving to make the world what it could be.…Becoming original is not the easiest path in the pursuit of happiness, but it leaves us perfectly poised for the happiness of the pursuit.”

    Go pursue.

     

    Like this post? You may also like:

    Our pick for best leadership book of the year:  Reality-Based Leadership

    Our pick for best novel of the year:  A Fall of Marigolds

  • Networking During the Holiday Season

    Networking During the Holiday Season

    For job seekers, the holidays can put a hold on the job search. So, what should you do while everyone is enjoying time off from work? Since more than 50% of jobs are filled through networking, use this down time to network, network, network!

    Networking can be intimidating. The best way to overcome the fear is to develop an elevator speech, practice, and network every chance you get.

    The University of Denver offers these guidelines for developing an elevator speech:

    • Keep your commercial simple and brief, and always include who you are, what you want to do and why it matters (or what the employer/client will get out of it).
    • Use a story or example to demonstrate your best qualities.
    • Use strong, action-packed words and speak in a confident, personable tone.
    • Be relevant. List the accomplishments (paid, unpaid, work, education or life experiences) that are relevant and compelling to your audience.
    • If job searching, be clear about the job title, function and industry you are interested in.
    • Practice your commercial, but don’t memorize; you want to sound natural!
    • Make a connection between yourself and your new acquaintance. End with a question to draw the contact into the conversation.

    Source: https://www.du.edu/career/networkingandevents/networkingtips/elevator.html

    Here is a list of networking opportunities to get you started (note the opportunistic ones!):

    • Personal Relationships (family, close friends, social groups)
    • Professional Relationships (colleagues, professional associations)
    • Associations (alumni, community, licensing, etc.)
    • Opportunistic (a woman you meet on the bus, a man next to you at the gym, online networks, etc.)
  • Jump start your 2018 professional growth now!

    Jump start your 2018 professional growth now!

    Have you ever wanted to start your own business?
    Jump start your 2018 professional growth now!

     

    Introducing new coursework available,
    Getting Off the Ground: 7 Steps to Developing a Successful Business

    Entrepreneurship is one of our passions.
    First taught at Professional Development Institute (PDI)
    at the NCDA Conference Summer 2017.
    Customized for Career Development Facilitators.

    Take advantage of this opportunity now!

    If you missed it at PDI, you can now benefit from the course at your own convenience at an even lower cost. The course is set-up on Udemy.com for easy processing, payment, and participation.

    Get here: 7 Steps to Developing a Successful Business

    Use coupon code: 7STEPS 

  • The Unattainable Work-Life Balance

    The Unattainable Work-Life Balance

    Is our elusive hunt for a work-life balance causing us undue stress in our lives and the lives of those around us?

    Generation X introduced the philosophy of the work-life balance in the 1970’s, and organizations and employees alike have spent the last few decades searching for that balance. But can anyone say they’ve found it?

    The major flaw with the work-life balance philosophy is that it’s based on the premise that your work self and your life self are two separate entities and to achieve balance, you must maintain that separation and seek a level of equality between the two.

    A study published in 2015 by the Harvard Business School and Stanford University showed that workplace stress can be just as harmful as second-hand smoke. If we’re bringing that stress home, imagine the impact it must have on our families.

    It took my thirteen-year-old son’s insight to show me that the struggle to achieve a work-life balance doesn’t just affect those trying to achieve it, it also affects everyone around them. About a year after moving to Huntsville from Northern Virginia I asked him if he was glad we moved. He told me that he was glad we moved and that his friends here were very different than his friends in Virginia. He explained how his friends here are more laid back, he could be more open with them without fear of them judging him, and how his friends from Northern Virginia were much more rigid and easily offended. His response both shocked me and made me realize just how much of an impact living in the rat race of the D.C. area had on my children.

    As the Indian Yogi and Poet Sadhguru said “There is no such thing as work-life balance- it is all life. The balance has to be within you.”

    The reality is that our work self and life self are two parts of the same whole and can never be fully separated. The Millennials have figured this out and taken the work-life balance philosophy and given it an overhaul. They have introduced us to the work-life integration philosophy. The work-life integration philosophy is a more synergistic approach, in which we must learn to blend our work self and life self into one cohesive unit.

    Many organizations are starting to buy into this concept and provide benefits to help employees integrate their work-life selves.

    • Evernote, a software company, provides their 250+ full-time employees with bi-weekly housecleaning services free of charge, $1000 annual vacation stipends, and a baby bonding program that provides an additional six weeks of paid leave.
    • SC Johnson & Son provides employees with concierge services, on-site childcare, flexible work hours & compressed work weeks.
    • Google provides on-site physicians, free lunches, massages, car washes, up to 12 weeks of paid leave, as well as $500 in “Baby Bonding Bucks” for new parents.

    While these examples are from larger companies, there are benefits that smaller employers can offer as well. I currently work with a client that offers their employees PTO hours in addition to vacation time. These hours are to be used for things such as doctor’s appointments, hair appointments, and parent-teacher conferences. They also provide a car wash service that comes onsite and employees can pay to have their car washed while they work.

    What benefits can your organization offer employees to help them achieve a work-life integration and reduce stress?