Horizon Point Consulting

Category: Beyond Work

Beyond Work is our line of resources for people and community leaders looking for something new and innovative outside, be it a new job, career change, or personal development outside of work.

  • Explain Your Why. Don’t Assume Why.

    Explain Your Why. Don’t Assume Why.

    After a particularly long doctor’s appointment with our seven-year-old, the topic of his prescription (he has epilepsy and takes a medicine to control his seizures) came up.

    The nurse practitioner came back in to say she had sent it to the pharmacy electronically.

    My husband said, “We need it written in 500mL increments.”

    She looked at him like who do you think you are, trying to tell me how to write a prescription.

    I looked at my husband and tried to telepathically tell him, “Explain to her why you are making that request.”  I may or may not have also thought “You idiot” too, but that’s beside the point.

    You see, I knew why he was making this request. His request had good intentions, not meant to serve his ego, but to serve others. We get his medicine from the community pharmacy where my husband works. He’s in administration at the hospital. The medicine comes to the pharmacy in 250mL bottles. The way our son’s prescription was written last time required bottles to be split which is a real pain for the pharmacy staff. The dosage is so close to 500mL for a three-month supply (450mL I think) that, in his mind, it was easy and made logical sense to write the prescription at 500mL. It would save everyone time.

    The nurse knew none of this.

    But once he started to explain that really all he was trying to do was make life easier for the people he works with, her face relaxed and she simply said, “Sure, we can do that.”

    If we had explained our why before we made the request, things would have been easier. It was fortunate that we could explain our way out of what looked like an ego trip.

    On the flip side of this, the nurse only knew what she knew as well, and that was our request. Her defensive response was totally natural. It is what most of us do. Our brain goes into defense mode when we don’t have all the inputs we need to understand a situation.

    However, what often derails us is making assumptions about people’s motives (i.e. my husband was on a power or control trip) when we don’t have the full context for communication or behaviors towards us. We don’t naturally respond by seeing people in a positive light as our first reaction (i.e. my husband is trying to help someone else out) when we don’t have all the information needed to understand a situation.

    So the next time you make a request of someone, explain to them why you are making that request. If you are the recipient of a request without all the details, don’t assume the worst of the person or the situation. Ask clarifying questions to gain mutual understanding.

    How do you explain the why and not assume the why?

  • The next activity you need to do with your leaders: What needs to start, stop or stay?

    The next activity you need to do with your leaders: What needs to start, stop or stay?

    “The first responsibility of a leader is to define reality.” Max DePree

    Feedback is a critical to any successful performance management and development process.  With trends in feedback moving leaders towards less formal mechanisms of feedback and away from a formal performance appraisal, we still need to be thinking about how to define the current state of someone’s behavior and performance in order to direct what we want to see.

    And sometimes we can formalize things and still make them feel “casual”.   A way to do this is to have a 1. Start 2. Stop 3.  Stay session.

    To do this:

    1. Get your team together.

    2. Give everyone a sheet of flip chart paper and different colored markers​.

    3. Ask them to write their name on the top of their sheet.

    4. Get each participant to create three columns labeled START, STOP, STAY.

    5. Get everyone to hang their flip chart piece on the wall​.

    6. Ask everyone to walk around the room indicating one behavior or action in each column on everyone’s paper.  Let participants know that if an item is already on the wall that they want to write down, to go ahead and write it down again.   Note:  This requires that everyone in the room know and interact with each other enough to have valid input.  If this isn’t the case, you may want to consider splitting the group up or telling people if they don’t know someone well enough to skip them.

    7. Get everyone to take their notepad down and review it. Prompt people to review in a way that:

    • Identifies patterns or trends. Are people saying the same things?
    • Checks
    • for self-awareness. Are they surprised, not surprised, upset, or glad to see what they are seeing?
    • Leads them to see if there are any clarifying questions they’d like to ask about their feedback. For example, (see a chart for me below done in a group training with a client) one person wrote I needed to start “090” them.  I didn’t know what this meant. Turns out it means to go back to the basics, or the remedial course (not the 100 level course) with them. This was such good feedback because it validated some of the puzzled looks I was getting at times in training when I assumed people knew what I was talking about but they didn’t.  I was thinking their looks meant they disagreed with me, but it meant they didn’t understand.

    8. Wrap up the exercise by asking each participant to commit to start, stop or staying on one thing on their list that they think will help them the most and get them to share what they are committing to with another person in the group for accountability.

     

    I find some people are really hesitant to do this in a group setting.  They think it won’t go over well because either 1.  People won’t be honest or 2.  People will get their feelings hurt and get upset.   Both of which can make the exercise counterproductive.

     However, I’ve actually found the opposite to be the case.  Facilitating this with clients has been one of the most positive efforts in performance development I have witnessed.  It leads to great dialogue and changed behaviors. Try it.  If it bombs, you can blame me.

    If you want a safer route, you can start by doing it one-on-one.   Ask people first for them to make a list of things you need to start, stop and stay.  Then reciprocate by providing them and list and talking one-on-one about it. 

     

    What are your go-to methods for getting and giving great feedback?

  • What If You Were Mystery Shopped?

    What If You Were Mystery Shopped?

    One of my clients is a small retail chain in North Alabama. Each month I send out an email communication to their store managers and I always include an article that I feel is relevant to their business to give them some food for thought.

    This month the topic was “If your store were mystery shopped, would you pass?” and the article included a sample mystery shop survey that has 35 questions. I challenged them to “shop” their own store and be brutally honest in their answers. Would they pass the test? And if not, what can they and their staff do to ensure that they would pass?

    As I was drafting the email to them, I realized that this challenge could be put forth to any organization, regardless of the industry they are in.

    The focus areas of the survey include:

    • Cleanliness and Appearance: Is the parking lot clean of debris? Is the office/store neat and well maintained?
    • Employee Behavior: Was the customer acknowledged within 30 seconds of entering the facility? Did the employee offer to assist the customer? Did the employee greet the customer with a smile?
    • Path to Purchase: Were the items the customer needed available? How long did the sales transaction take?

    While granted some of the questions on the survey pertain specifically to a retail environment, they can be adjusted to apply to almost any type of business.

    If your organization was mystery shopped, would you pass the test? If not, what can you do to ensure that you would pass?

  • Leaders, Expect the Unexpected!

    Leaders, Expect the Unexpected!

    “Expect the unexpected.” -Zig Zigler

    During a recent hike on Rainbow Mountain with my three boys and two dogs, I was gently reminded that even when you expect the unexpected, you can be caught off guard.

    Multiple times during our hike when my oldest was leading the way, I reminded him to go slow and watch out for snakes. Then about half way through the hike we stopped to take a break. The boys sat down on a large rock and I sat down about ten feet ahead of them. Almost as soon as I sat down, I heard the leaves beside me rustling and looked over to watch what I’m pretty sure was a copperhead snake slither across the path in front of me.

    Even though I had warned my son multiple times to be on the lookout, I didn’t actually think we’d walk up on a snake while hiking.  And while I am not afraid of snakes (spiders are a different story), it still caught me off guard and I quickly had to assess the situation and decide how to respond, as well as how my boys and dogs would respond if they saw it.

    I quietly told my boys to stand still and as soon as it had slithered far enough away from me into the woods, I slowly stood up and moved to where they were. Together we waited a few minutes so that the snake had time to go on down into the woods and we could safely continue up the path.

    As leaders, we try to expect the unexpected and prepare in advance how to respond. But there are times when regardless of how much we anticipate and prepare, we are still caught off guard. So how can we navigate those situations?

    • Take a deep breath and don’t panic. Stress impacts how we make decisions and often causes us to view the risks and rewards differently than we would otherwise.
    • Assess the situation. As I tell my 12-year-old when he gets upset over something, ask yourself “in the grand scheme of things, how important is this?” What impact will this truly have? What can you do to mitigate it or even turn it into a positive?
    • Seek out help. Don’t be afraid, or embarrassed, to enlist the help of others. We all need to lean on others sometimes. And they may be able to offer a perspective we hadn’t considered.
    • Be flexible. Plans aren’t foolproof. Sometimes they work great, sometimes they work halfway, and sometimes they don’t work at all. That’s okay. Make adjustments where needed, or if necessary, scrap the entire plan and go back to the drawing board.
    • Assess the results. What went well and what could you have done better? What was the impact on your organization?
    • Celebrate your success. Whether it’s a new product or service, a new policy or procedure rollout, or just putting out a fire, take the time to celebrate your success and congratulate yourself and those who helped. For me, it was taking the boys and dogs for ice cream after our hike.

    The next time you find yourself in a situation that catches you off guard, how will you respond?

  • Women in Business Need Male Mentors

    Women in Business Need Male Mentors

    My first professional mentor was a man.  In college, I helped him with his research and he helped me grow as a human being in too many ways to count.  It was no big deal for us to have one-on-one discussions in his office with the door closed.  I never thought anything of it.  I suspect he didn’t either.  Nor were my parents concerned.  They are as grateful to him for the positive influence he had on me as I am.

    This mentor often spoke truth with directness to the situations I was dealing with that I found myself getting too emotional about.  He also commended me when I acted in ways that showed I was capable and confident.  Characteristics a woman is often chided for. This was invaluable.

    My best boss was a man.  He gave me the freedom to run with my ideas and got out of my way when I did so.   It was not uncommon for us to travel in the car to places for work related events, just the two of us.  I never thought anything of it.  I doubt he, his wife, or my husband did either.

    This boss didn’t make me feel like an idiot when I cried in his office to him about something, that in hindsight, was stupid.  Nor did he get condescending when we joked and left a positive pregnancy test on his desk as an April Fool’s joke.  Pregnant I was not then, but a month later I was. Oops.  He was also so proud when both my kids were born and gave me more flexibility than most after the first was born and I was also trying to finish my Masters thesis.  He also spoke truth to my emotion and taught me to ask for forgiveness instead of permission.  He praised me for behavior that is also often uncommon for a woman to demonstrate.

    I’m often at lunch one-on-one with men.   They are typically clients or perspective clients.  I think nothing of asking a man to lunch.  I don’t think anything of asking anyone to lunch, male or female. Mealtime is natural way to build dialogue and relationships.

    But the last time I was in a restaurant with a male client (in my hometown) an acquaintance-friend I know saw me sitting there with him.  She looked away.  When I saw her later on, she asked me who he was and why I was there with him.   It was obvious she thought it was weird.  She seemed to disapprove.  I was confused.

    But in this #metoo world we are living in, if people find it strange for a female to be at lunch with a male that is anyone other than her spouse or possibly father, how can we expect it to be okay for both women and men to feel comfortable in one-on-one situations that often help to build strong business relationships, healthy dialogue and positive results?

    At #SHRM18, Sheryl Sandberg spoke about, among other things, the need for women to have male mentors.   She related this to helping women model behaviors, more often demonstrated in males, that help women achieve business success.  I know my male mentors and colleagues have helped me with this (not to mention my dad and my husband, both of whom have probably had more of an influence on this than my professional male relationships.)

    Sheryl didn’t give a lot of advice on how to make men mentoring women totally acceptable despite the #metoo challenges.

    The one direct thing she said to men fearful of establishing these relationships was, “If you don’t feel comfortable having dinner with a woman, don’t have dinner with a man.  Group meals for everyone.”

    I struggle with this though.  The value I gained from the men in my life who have shaped me almost always came in the form of one-on-one, direct feedback.  This just doesn’t take place in a group settings.

    So, like Sheryl, while I don’t have a lot of direct advice to give on how to help this situation, maybe this quote I just came across by Bob Goff can speak the greatest truth:

     

    I have two lunch meetings on my calendar for this week.  Both are with men.   I won’t be afraid, and I pray that for all the great men out there, the world and the media won’t harden or scare you to the point that you are uncomfortable alone with a woman that you can help become the business person and woman she needs to be.