Horizon Point Consulting

Category: Beyond Leadership

Beyond Leadership is Horizon Point’s line of resources for managers of people. Managing ourselves is a distinct set of behaviors from managers the work of others, and we are here to help. Read stories in this category if you are ready to take the next step into people leadership (or if you’re looking for articles to send someone else…).

  • The Surgeon General’s Warning and Professional Development

    The Surgeon General’s Warning and Professional Development

    As I take in my daily dose of news fed to me via email by the New York Times on Saturday, August 31, I’m surprised to see the title: Opinion: Surgeon General: Parents Are at Their Wits’ End. We Can Do Better.  

    Saturday’s Times email blast usually features a more lighthearted piece, especially on a holiday weekend. 

    But as I opened the article, I couldn’t help thinking, “No sh*t!” to what the Surgeon General was saying. You see, I have literally just cleaned up sh*t (Or wait, was it vomit?) off the floor of our bathroom as child number two out of three started with a full round of the stomach bug and didn’t quite make it to the toilet. 

    Such are the “joys”, I guess, as the Surgeon General references in his opinion piece. It is back to school season and everyone is passing around germs. 

    But this is not all that has come during back to school month in a household of three children ages 13,10, and 5. When they are healthy, EVERYDAY at school, everyday of life, demands something. 

    Take for example, the day before the holiday weekend started. One child had to bring a snack for his class that corresponded with the color of the day- black. In case you are wondering, Oreos were a hit for the group of four and five year olds. And don’t forget, he had to wear black too. This is day nine of ten days of the color game where corresponding outfits with the color of the day are a must. We opted for bracelets two of the ten days because I refused to go buy clothes just to meet the color demands of Pre-K. 

    The ten-year-old had student council speeches at 8:15 am the same day. Prior to said speech, this required the speech to be written and turned in for approval and posters to be made. Oh, and a parent form to sign. Of course, it outlined the requirements and obligations of both parent and student for accepting the role of leading the student government of an elementary school. She ran for President and lost, so cue in the emotional support needing to be provided there. This support takes place in between trips to the said toilet with the stomach bug. 

    And the thirteen year old. Well, his struggles have been much like the Surgeon General leads his article with- serious health issues. On this Thursday before the Labor Day holiday, he had just been discharged from an almost week long hospital stay. 

    So, you can see why I was saying “No sh*t!” to the Surgeon General op-ed. It has been a season for our family of intense stress. Honestly, it takes a toll even when someone isn’t hospitalized or throwing up everywhere. 

    The demands for black snacks, constant school events- which nine times out of ten requires you to send money and fill out a form- is ongoing. And let us not forget figuring out how the heck you are going to carve out time to work to pay for all this stuff and get work done (if you are fortunate enough to have the flexibility to leave work) to attend kids activities in and out of school or care for them when they are sick. 

    I have it made, but…

    The Surgeon General and I may not be in identical boats, but we both have it “made” when it comes to the lifestyle we can afford for ourselves and our children. 

    As the first comment I saw of the NYT piece said, “Dr. Murphy had access to top shelf medical care and a supportive workplace. He is very lucky. A lot of parents don’t have these advantages.”  

    I have these advantages too. My husband and I work for ourselves and therefore have a ton of flexibility when it comes to when and where and how we do work. At least one of us can make the 8:15 am student council speech and another the 2:15 carline pick up line because our five year old is too young to go to extended day at the elementary school where he attends. We don’t have to punch a time clock, and we are able to divide and conquer.  

    Our health insurance is uber expensive and not that great of coverage honestly, but we have it. We don’t have to make decisions on whether to access the healthcare system if any of us needs it based on whether or not we can afford it. 

    That doesn’t negate the stress, though, of the 12:08 am email that had to go out to a client the night my son was admitted to hospital to say, last minute, that I wouldn’t be at his facility the next morning given what I described to him vaguely as “a family medical emergency.”  Or the meeting I had to put off twice about starting a new contract with another client with the same vague reasoning. I eventually had to delegate the meeting to a person on my team who I know executed everything beautifully. But it is just another example of the constant- and I mean constant- reshuffling I have to do to try to work- and I’m lucky that it is work I love- and raise kids.  

    I cannot imagine the toll day-to-day parenting takes on the single parent, the parent that can’t leave work or they will be fired, the parent who doesn’t have insurance, and the parent who doesn’t have a village of people around them helping them.

    We’ve been raising kids since the beginning of time. Has it always been this hard? 

    So maybe it is just the way things are today.  Me and peers are making too much of parenting, spending too much time worrying about our kids, engaging them and us in too many activities in and out of school, worried too much about them missing out. Or are we both working when only one of us should? Or are we worried about missing out on every single thing they do because of the comparison and judgment between parents that show up for everything and those that do not?  

    I think since the beginning of time parenting has been stressful. Cue Cain and Abel and that tragedy. I’m sure the death of one son at the hand of the other was pretty stressful for Adam and Eve income, privilege, and societal demands of the time and all aside. The stress of trying to provide the very best care for our children so they can grow up to be healthy adults is not new, and I think it is one all parents have shared since the beginning of time. 

    But there are some things today that are different.  As comments in the NYT article point to, screens and social media do, I think, play a role in the difficulties. They aren’t to blame, but they do play a role. The way the structure of work is misaligned with education and childcare (access and affordability) plays a role. The way we are constantly striving for more, more, more plays a role. And as many of the comments in the NYT Op-Ed point to, this seems to be unique to America. Do kids really need to go on two field trips in one month at school? Do we really need to operate this factory 24/7/365?  The healthcare system, as MANY comments in the NYT article point to, plays a role and adds a lot of stress if and when you have to encounter it. And if you are alive, you will at one point or another. 

    And as I write this last paragraph, my inbox dings with a breaking news alert from the Times, “Four people were killed and at least nine injured in a shooting on the campus of a Georgia high school, the authorities said.”  

    Yeah, there is that stress too.  If I send my kid to school today, are they going to get shot?

    Yes, things are the same as the beginning of time, and yet they are different. 

    So how on earth do I- or people like me who have pretty constant caregiving demands and stress- even think about professional development? 

    We’ve been focused on the importance of professional development on the blog for the last few weeks. We’ve talked about what we’ve been up to for professional development, the ROI of it, and how to do it when you don’t really have a budget for it. 


    But what if you are in a season of life where you just don’t have the time for it or the mental bandwidth to focus on it? Did you notice in the what we’ve been up to for professional development post what I’ve been doing for PD?  Nope, you didn’t. That is because I am not doing a thing! Practicing what I preach I am not.   

    What if you are leading someone or working along someone that is in this season?  Many of which are sandwiched caregivers- caring for growing children and aging parents all at once.  

    Or are you leading someone who really needs to focus on caring for themselves? Or a spouse or other loved one? Let’s face it, everyone has something with varying degrees of intensity and capacity to handle that intensity. 

    As I am contemplating this post while caring for the thirteen year old through his go-round with the stomach bug (yes, it made its way through all of us), I get a text from someone that works with me. I cringe when she says she works “for” me, but I pay her. I’m supposed to be that leader who is focused on the ROI of her professional development. 

    She asks when would be a good time for her to call me. I tell her I’m free and the phone rings shortly after. 

    After checking on us and also talking about her family, she says, “I’m pregnant.”   

    I congratulate her and we talk about some work things. Then, she circles back around to what I know has been on her mind the most. How does she navigate having and raising this child with work? 

    How do I do it? she asks. Well, not really well at the moment I want to tell her!  

    I know she wonders if the same privilege I gave myself of easing back into work after having all three of my kids be afforded to her? Of course it will. Of course. 

    And what about healthcare? Can she get on the company’s family coverage? I reach out to get the benefits plan information from our insurance provider to send to her shortly after we get off the phone. 

    The Surgeon General points to things in his piece like paid parental leave and changes in healthcare to help with the “toll” of parenting. Whereas I don’t think anything he mentions are bad things, my political philosophy inclines me to think that it isn’t the government’s job to alleviate “tolls” we face, but our very own. 

    It is the job of families, employers, and communities to create a healthy society. To help society successfully navigate and mitigate the tolls this life lays on each and every one of us and to revel in the joy that comes with life too. 

    Some of the hard cannot and will not be avoided, but some of it can be made better if we care for and treat each other well. That is where the joy mostly comes from. 

    And, yes, families, employers, and communities need to play an active role advocating for the government to play its role where it should, but we can’t turn a blind eye to the choices we have in each of our roles to make a difference. 

    We can treat people like humans, honor the stage of life they are in, and design a workplace around getting work done and getting it done with excellence while also realizing a person’s productivity may ebb and flow based on where they are in life. And realizing it will really ebb in the wrong direction if we neglect to see the whole person and if we try to treat humans like machines. 

    Some balls bounce and some balls break

    A week or so after the conversation with the pregnancy announcement, we have our monthly one-on-one. We talk through a lot of client work and potential work. It is kind of hectic. We have to call another team member in at one point to talk through an execution plan for a new client. 

    And as we usually do in one-on-ones, we spend some time talking about her professional development within the context of her needs and the company’s needs. 

    I can tell she is concerned about taking on too much during this season of her life where a new child will enter and in her current state where she just doesn’t feel good and she never knows when that may or may not hit. Thus are the joys of growing a human being inside you. 

    I think out loud and I can tell my thinking out loud may be overwhelming her. I even sometimes overwhelm myself with it.  

    So, I stop. I ask her to think about one thing she wants to grow in professionally. Just one.  I can tell she doesn’t want to stall her learning and growth, and she says as much, but she also wants some grace as she navigates what looks like a very different season coming up for her.  

    I don’t want her to stop learning and growing. I want her to continue to grow in her confidence and skills where she can continue to add value to the organization.  But I know she won’t do either of these things if she is overwhelmed. 

    None of us perform at an optimum level when we are overwhelmed. And let’s face it, I’ve been overwhelmed pretty much all year.  What is it the Surgeon General called it? Oh yes, I’m at my “Wits’ End.” 

    So, as I heed advice to her, I heed advice to myself.  What is the one thing I want to grow in?  Not ten things, not three things, one thing.  

    Seasons come and seasons go, and right now the season for both of us is one of intense child-rearing. If I’m honest (and you can probably already tell based on my tone to begin with), I am sometimes resentful of the intensity of this child rearing season that takes me away from a focus on professional growth. 

    But like my colleague said in the same meeting, we have rubber balls and we have glass balls. If we drop a rubber ball, it will bounce. But if we drop a glass ball, it will break.  

    My professional growth and hers will bounce. 

    Our children are glass and we parents will do everything in our power to make sure nothing causes them to break. Sometimes we need help discerning what will help our kids grow and what might break them, just like we do for ourselves. 

    But in this season of life for both of us, we both need something we can claim for ourselves and our own growth, even if it is just one thing. One small thing.  It will, I know, make us better parents to have this one thing to call our own and to have each other to challenge us to do it and not take our eye off that ball, even if it will bounce. 

    The whole person of each of your employees and the value they bring to your organization are glass balls too. What are you doing today to make sure they don’t break? Especially when the Surgeon General is issuing warnings about it? 

    And what are you doing to give them a ball or two to bounce so they learn and grow and continue to add value for themselves and your organization? 

  • Who cares about Professional Development? Horizon Point does!

    Who cares about Professional Development? Horizon Point does!

    This week kicks off a brand-new series here at The Point Blog. The Fall brings a new school year and with that, all things Professional Development. Some would consider this topic a snooze fest, but if it is tailored to an individual’s needs and desires for career growth, it can be one of the most exciting things that you get to do! Mary Ila supports our interests by meeting with us for monthly one on ones and asks us what we would like to be doing and the best way that the company can support our future goals. We also discuss our opportunities for Professional Development as a team when we meet at our Monthly Mingles.

    In my own journey of leadership development and career growth, I ventured out and started a new class last week. The class is Highlands College Leadership Institute. It will meet for an hour on Tuesday nights for 4 semesters, and the BEST part of it all? Horizon Point is investing in me to do it. I could not be more interested in the content that I’m learning, and I cannot wait to take back what I have learned about to our team for us to implement what I’ve been taught. That’s the beauty of Professional Development done the right way. It adds value!

    Jillian on our team has been sharing all about ATD24 and her experience at Recharge Your Soul, their annual Expo. In one of her recent blogs she shares…

    The theme for ATD24 was Recharge Your Soul. I absolutely felt recharged when I left, so much that I couldn’t stop talking about it (still can’t). 

    Jillian’s experience and excitement about the things that she learned inspired the rest of us at our Mingle when she handed out cards from different vendors and shared her stories. Not only is Mary Ila adding value to us individually, but as a whole, our team is better because of these opportunities.


    Taylor was recently certified in School Career Development Advisor (SCDA) Training and can now offer the training through our website in addition to Career Development Training that is offered. Not only is the company investing in Taylor, but she is turning around and adding value to Horizon Point with her unique interests and skills.


    Last but not least Lorrie got to attend the American Correctional Conference in Nashville last month and sent pictures of the songwriter Jelly Roll in our group text message. She said that it was one of the best conferences that she had been to and the experience ties right into Lorrie’s interests. Lorrie holds a bachelor’s degree in Psychology with a minor in Criminal Justice and recently received her Master’s of Jurisprudence in Labor and Employment Law at Tulane University Law School.


    Can you see the value of Professional Development? It doesn’t have to be the boring old lectures with stale ideas. If it is done the right way, it brings life to your employees. So go ahead and start asking, “How can I best support you?”

  • SPECIAL FEATURE: June Leadership Development Carnival

    SPECIAL FEATURE: June Leadership Development Carnival

    We are honored to host this month’s Leadership Development Carnival. At Horizon Point, we find that each month the carnival is filled with rich content to enhance your knowledge of Leadership. We hope that you enjoy it as much as we do!

    Communication

    Is Empathy Dying?
    Sadly empathy seems to be dying. It can be devastating to relationships… both personal and professional. Learn why this is important and how you can reclaim it. — Eileen McDargh, CSP, CPAE (@macdarling)

    Divided we fail, in dialogue we create the future
    In this time of challenges we need dialogue and solutions but we see polarization. Also at work, you must take a stand. Are you pro or contra? Divided we fail, but through dialogue, we can solve our challenges and create the future. — Marcella Bremer (@MarcellaBremer)

    The Power of Neutral Language: Time to Think First and Communicate Second
    How do we minimize the number of regretful remarks we will make in the future– be they verbally, in writing, or through social media? How do we avoid saying something we might come to bemoan? My prescription? Think first, communicate second, and by doing so, change the language to something neutral. And, when we fail to do this – after all, we’re all human – and instead blurt out something unkind, unproductive or unprofessional, apologize. — DIANA PETERSON-MORE (linkedin.com/in/leadership-consultant-usa)

    Creativity/Inspiration

    June Tune Up! Add a Little Oil!
    Mother Teresa once said, “To keep a lamp burning, we have to keep putting oil in it.” Leadership is about helping others discover who they are and how they impact the lives of others. We aim to have a positive impact on those around us and be the support system they need to continue growing. — Brenda Yoho (@BrendaYoho or https://www.linkedin.com/in/brendayoho/)

    Development

    Invisible Costs Can Cost You a Lot
    When making decisions, most people view cost as an important consideration. While price is undoubtedly crucial, what about invisible costs that also come into play? — Frank Sonnenberg (@FSonnenberg)

    Which Double Standard for Women Applies To You? All of Them?
    Double standards for women in leadership is an age-old problem, but it turns out that it’s not just a problem for leaders; it’s a problem for all women in the workplace. It’s important to see the double standards women face in their broader context as a result of implicit and unconscious biases we all hold. — Dana Theus (@DanaTheus)

    Opportunity Focused Leadership
    Do you aim to be a problem-focused leader or an opportunity focused leader?

    Many work environments place a premium on leaders with critical thinking and problem-solving skills. However, that premium often places too much emphasis on being critical and dealing with problems. I suggest a different way. — Bill Treasurer (https://www.linkedin.com/in/courage)

    How to keep your best leaders: 4 keys to build a flourishing leadership pipeline
    A recent Gallup study highlights significant concerns among those serving in managerial roles. Their research found managers more likely than non-managers to be disengaged at work, burned out, looking for a new job and feeling like their organization doesn’t care about their wellbeing. Amid these intense challenges, what can you do to keep your best leaders? Here are four keys to build a flourishing leadership pipeline. — Jon Lokhorst (https://www.linkedin.com/in/jonlokhorst/)

    Where Does Your Work Culture Fall in the 5 Levels of Workplace Inspiration?
    A work culture that validates teams members for their efforts and sense of responsibility will create an engaged workforce. — S. Chris Edmonds (https://www.linkedin.com/in/chrisedmonds)

    Keep Your Business Healthy: The Four Pillars of Sound Financial Practices
    Operational savvy doesn’t always come easy, and a business owner sometimes, out of necessity, has to put on hats they aren’t equipped. I often hear “But I’m not an accountant!” and I understand. Still, if you are going to own a business, you have to take responsibility for the financial aspects of your business as well as other operations and product/service development and sales. — Jon Verbeck (https://www.linkedin.com/in/jonverbeck)

    Engagement

    Declining Employee Engagement Signals an Opportunity
    Gallup Research recently issued a red flag about employee engagement. Michael Stallard and Katharine Stallard explain why it actually represents an opportunity for leaders. — Michael Lee Stallard (https://www.linkedin.com/in/michaelstallard)

    Leadership Development

    Leading Through Change in the Workplace: Key Strategies to Use Today
    The complexities of the business environment mean change is one thing most employees can expect, whether they like it or not. Changes in strategy, restructuring, layoffs, the prevalence of mergers and acquisitions, people, and workplace culture issues – the list goes on and on. Read on to see how leaders can help minimize disruption and keep employees engaged. — David Grossman (https://www.linkedin.com/in/davidgrossmanaprabc)

    Productivity

    How Documenting Effective Systems Improves Team Culture and Performance
    Clearly communicated systems aren’t rigid shackles – but rather the essential musical score that ensures everyone plays in perfect harmony, unlocking exceptional team culture and performance. — Sean Glaze (@leadyourteam)

    It’s About Time! 10 Ways to Offer the Time Autonomy Employees Crave
    The clock is ticking towards a more autonomous future. This article offers concrete tools and strategies within any leader’s control to offer the time flexibility people crave – and in the process, build a magnetic and unbeatable culture where talent thrives. — Julie Winkle Giulioni (https://www.linkedin.com/in/juliewinklegiulioni)

    Quality is a Journey to Excellence
    Quality means not only the quality of the product, but also the quality of the processes producing the product, the quality of the designs that go into processes and the product, quality people, quality systems, quality service, quality everything… just quality through and through everywhere. We need to adopt a new way to manage and run organizations. – John Hunter (@aJohnHunter)

    \Swinging for the Fence to Slow Productivity
    Following my sabbatical almost three years ago where I said no to everything for almost eight weeks, I came out refreshed and ready to swing for the fence again. I slowly but surely started picking up balls. One at a time, we added client after client, one of which is sucking the ever living life out of me right now. — Mary Ila Ward (https://www.linkedin.com/in/mary-ila-ward)

    Team Building

    Hiring the Right Players
    Every organization needs leaders who can come in and quickly understand the organization’s past, learn the present environment, and develop an effective plan. The challenge is exercising patience and diligence in the selection process to hire the right players; being clear about what and who you need. — Priscilla Archangel (@prisarchangel)

    Is a pro basketball player’s story the key to fighting mediocrity?
    Robyn McLeod of Thoughtful Leaders Blog presents Is a pro basketball player’s story the key to fighting mediocrity? where she shares that while mediocrity can be contagious, the antidote is a focus on winning and innovation – and the encouragement of the Charles Barkleys in your organization who can rally their teams to success. — Robyn McLeod (@ThoughtfulLdrs)


  • Swinging for the Fence to Slow Productivity

    Swinging for the Fence to Slow Productivity

    We swung for the fences and came up short…
    Yeah, you win some, you lose some, it ain’t always home runs
    And that’s just the way life plays…
    Morgan Wallen

    A few years ago, I was facilitating a DiSC training session with one of my colleagues. We use a motivation checklist tied to the DiSC Personality Model to emphasize that different things motivate different people.

    We always encourage people to ask a peer what they think motivates them. Based on the behaviors you observe in another person, “What do you think makes them tick?” is the question we ask. I asked my colleague during the session to comment on what she thought my top two are. 

    She immediately said, “Well one is, ‘Taking on new challenges.’” 

    It wasn’t one of the top two I had marked.  Actually, in going through the checklist, it really wasn’t one I had even considered. 

    But as I reflected, I realized how off my self awareness might be.  She was spot on. I’m always swinging for the fence. On top of that, I very rarely wait patiently for the next pitch. I take on as much as I can, always ready for the challenge of knocking it all out of the park. 

    Too Many Balls 

    Following my sabbatical almost three years ago where I said no to everything for almost eight weeks, I came out refreshed and ready to swing for the fence again. I slowly but surely started picking up balls. One at a time, we added client after client, one of which is sucking the ever living life out of me right now. I picked up volunteer board seat balls. Thinking that the flexibility my husband now had given his change in careers would allow him to help out with the softballs of three kids, I said yes to more. Yes to travel, both personal and professional, yes to training for a marathon. Yes to a 17 year old from Costa Rica living with us. 

    Not only is my disposition to always swing for the fence, I am also always juggling a lot of balls trying to hit them all out of the park. Balls I’m trying to help others hit out of the park. I realized on one random Tuesday in April, I had dealt with ten different people calling me in crisis- or perceived crisis- needing my help. None of them were family, all balls I had picked up doing apparently what I’m good at.  As my husband has said, “I swear you have a sign on your forehead that reads, ‘Please spill your guts to me. I am here to help!’”

    But then a curveball invariably gets thrown. And two softball sized ones- one professional and one personal- hit me like a ton of bricks this spring.

    As I told my team, “I can juggle 18 balls at a time, but throw me 19 with a curve, and I want to drop them all.  It makes me realize maybe 15 balls is where I should have stopped.  I never should have picked up 16, 17, or 18 to begin with.  

    If I had never picked up those three, I could have handled the softballs, but by not stopping before it got to be too much, I seemed to be ill equipped to function given the big two.  

    I immediately went to, ok, sabbatical time again!  I need eight weeks of nothing! 

    Grand Slams

    For our second quarter planning meeting, you better believe “Sabbaticals” was on the agenda.  Unlike last time, everyone saw it and everyone brought it up before it was even time to discuss it. Everyone on the team has been in the business of picking up lots of balls too. We love to play the game, leaning into our mission, but it can get exhausting. 

    At our yearly planning meeting three months prior, we had worked hard to see where everyone was with current projects and what people wanted to grow in and what people wanted to divest in. I had named these things for myself too, already knowing in January that there were some balls that I wanted and needed to throw out.  But sometimes divesting in things takes time.  And I am trying to exit on some of them gracefully.  And I really wanted to equip my team to lead on some things they were capable of doing even better than I could, but there was inevitably some training involved in that. 

    We’d made plans for transitions. I communicated to boards I served on that I would not be serving another term- find a replacement! I’d be done with my bucket list marathon at the end of April. My so-stressful-I-can’t-sleep-at-night looming client issue would come to a peak at the same time and then be easier (or so I thought). 

    But by April, I was ready to say, “Forget gracefully!”  Every ball I’ve got is being thrown to the curb!”  

    “And that’s just the way life plays….”

    Right after this, I find myself heading to Oxford, Mississippi for a Morgan Wallen concert. You see, he is my daughter’s favorite musician. For Christmas, we had surprised her with tickets to his concert at Ole Miss in April. At the time, I wasn’t aware of how difficult the time between Christmas and April would be. The last ball I really wanted to have to juggle over that weekend was to be away from home again. 

    But she was ecstatic, and we weren’t going to miss it. After four hours in the rain listening to not one, not two, but three opening acts, he finally came on stage. A few songs in, he transitioned to my daughter’s favorite song, ‘98 Braves.  

    I felt the slow creep of the lyrics speaking to me:

    We swung for the fences and came up short…
    Yeah, you win some, you lose some, it ain’t always home runs
    And that’s just the way life plays…

    The personal issue got even more pronounced while I was gone.  The client issue came to a head right after I got back, and it was shared with me that it would get even more intense over the summer and into the fall. 

    Again, the thought, just throw the balls away. All of them. Quit swinging.

    Then, as I was unwinding the evening after my client engagement, I got a call from my husband. “He’s hit a grand slam! Cortez hit a grand slam!!” Drew was almost in tears. Our brown eyed boy who after seven years of baseball with us, had finally hit one over, and a grand slam at that!  His mother was in tears, I was in tears.  

    Seasons of Life 

    It takes some time for me to moderate the pendulum swings in my life. I preach moderation, but I often don’t practice it. And when I’m swinging for the fence all the time with too many balls, I get to a breaking point. I want to quit. 

    But, as I reflected I realized, I think I’m entering a season in my life where I can begin to honor the seasons of the game.  

    As Emily Freeman says so aptly, “Just because things change doesn’t mean you chose wrong in the first place. Just because you’re good at something doesn’t mean you have to do it forever.”  

    I’ve realized I’m in the season now where I would rather see someone else hit home runs. I get more joy and satisfaction from the win a teammate gets than I do experiencing it for myself. Like the speaking gig they are invited to instead of me. Like the colleagues who are about to land a very big fish or two that could substantially change their income (we pay a commission on business anyone lands) at a season in life where income is being sucked out like a vacuum. Kids in college ain’t cheap. For someone else to serve in that board role and learn.  

    It used to be that if our brown eyed boy was going to make it to a game or a practice or anything for that matter, we were going to have to take him.  After almost seven years, his mom takes him to most things now. She has stepped up to the plate and she is helping him knock it over the fence. It is a joy to see the evolution of their journey. 

    Most importantly, there is no greater joy than to see my kids well and excelling. Although Cortez isn’t our biological child, his successes and my three biological kids’ successes are more important to me than almost anything. Faith’s- our Costa Rica 17 year old- successes are important to me. The wonderful team I get to work with everyday at HPC are all so important to me.  And when I say successes, hitting a real grand slam isn’t what I mean, although the hard work and commitment that goes into hitting them is. 

    I’m ready to throw the balls for others to hit, not hit them myself. And I’m ready to be happy with a single, especially if it knocks in another run.  I’m not ready to stop stepping up to the plate or step up to the mound, I just need to modify my game plan. 

    And maybe you do too. 

    “When we want to give up, maybe what we need to do is open the door to doing things differently, not doing something different all together. “

    Mary Ila Ward

    “Slow Productivity” 

    For me, doing things differently is looking like a shift from choosing an all or nothing pace. A pace defined by what Cal Newport describes in his book titled the same as “Slow Productivity”.  His key pillars include: 

    • Focus on fewer things
    • Work at a natural pace
    • Obsess over quality

    Maybe I’ll take a sabbatical before 2024 is over, maybe I won’t (everyone else on the HPC team will be taking one in 2024-2025). I will be taking the summer to practice slow productivity, where I focus on the fewer balls that matter, namely, helping others succeed at the game, working at a pace that is more reasonable by saying no to the things that aren’t for me in this season, and by obsessing over the quality of relationships that are most important to me. 

    What Really Matters?

    In that same DiSC training, where I realized my self-awareness was totally off the mark in the challenges I take on, I also realized maybe I wasn’t totally self-aware illiterate. 

    The second motivator my colleague picked for me was, “Helping other people succeed.”  I had picked this one too. 

    I think my swinging for the fence can get in the way of me helping other people succeed sometimes. Especially people closest to me. It comes from a motivation to take on new challenges coupled with a desire to fix things. I’m looking forward to watching others hit it out of the park- by throwing the ball well, taking the bunt to advance the runner in front of me, or simply cheering from the stands- realizing that taking on challenging situations may just come in the form of helping others put in the work and patiently waiting seven years or more for the dividends to come. 

  • A Tale of Two Employers: Workplace Appreciation

    A Tale of Two Employers: Workplace Appreciation

    “Employees don’t quit their job, they quit their manager.” How many times have you heard that phrase? Have you ever identified so much with it, thinking its origin may in fact be you for how well it resonates with your experiences? Well, I have. 

    I worked with a large company for almost 3 years, holding 2 different jobs within that time, searching for a position that would maintain my attention and highlight my skills coupled with a manager who would invest in me as both an employee and a person. In those 3 years, I found neither of those things and they were the longest 3 years of my life. I was continuously in a state of #OpentoWork, applying for positions well under my skill and experience level simply to be taken out of the toxicity that was my daily 9 – 5. But let’s unpack the situation further. 

    I was continuously in a state of #OpentoWork, applying for positions well under my skill and experience level simply to be taken out of the toxicity that was my daily 9 – 5.

    My first position with this company looked amazing on paper. The interviews highlighted efforts and initiatives that drew on my favorite aspects of my past positions and experiences and I was eager to get started. Once I did, I struggled with the management style I was receiving, communicating my needs only to consistently be met with unmet expectations. That, coupled with a difficult culture and internal resistance to what I was tasked to work towards, made it difficult to enjoy the work I was doing, but I persevered. I don’t believe in giving up when the going gets tough, but rather plowing through the difficulties and making the best of any situation. That is, until that situation bears no further potential. 

    The pinnacle of toxicity in a large organization comes to light with the vocalization of one word: re-org. Having never worked for such a large company before, I was naïve to what was to come. Long story short: my manager left their position, leaving me to be a team of 1. Their position was also eliminated as a result of the re-org, so I now had no growth opportunities. I saw the writing on the wall and knew I had to make a move and I had to make it fast. 

    So I transferred internally to a different team that, from the outside, seemed even more exciting than the first. Travel opportunities, engaging with high level internal and external leadership, autonomy over my work and…future growth opportunities! It was like the light I had been searching for at the end of the tunnel. Spoiler alert: it was not. 

    This new opportunity was worse than the previous, but for different reasons. The person I directly reported to was all but nonexistent. I communicated with them maybe once per month, and even then it seemed our short-lived conversations were meant only for them to check a box. No communication on how I was doing in the role, any help I may need or feedback I may have – nothing. The individual responsible for training and day to day oversight of me was the living embodiment of the phrase “hostile work environment”. I often left conversations thinking to myself “am I stupid?” because that’s how they made me feel. 

    The person I directly reported to was all but nonexistent. I communicated with them maybe once per month, and even then it seemed our short-lived conversations were meant only for them to check a box.

    While my first position with the company hadn’t been what I was looking for, this second position was quickly soul crushing. It traded my self-esteem and value for anxiety and a state of constant fear of reprimanding. There was no appreciation. Toxic behaviors like working 12-15 hour days, working weekends, sacrificing sleep – these were praised. Suggestions on process improvement or seeking genuine autonomy were met with hostility to the point where I stopped making suggestions. 

    I found myself once again searching for the right position. I was determined not to settle, knowing I had settled in the past, but I couldn’t seem to find anything. My determination was no match for the vibrant and competitive workforce that exists in North Alabama. Opportunity after opportunity drifted by and I was beginning to think I was never going to find the right position. Worse even, I was beginning to think that perhaps the problems I was facing weren’t the managers, but rather it was me. Were my expectations too high? Did the “right position” I kept dreaming of even exist? 

    Worse even, I was beginning to think that perhaps the problems I was facing weren’t the managers, but rather it was me. Were my expectations too high?

    And then one day, I got an Indeed message…about the position I was dreaming of getting into…with a small business, an environment I was desperately eager to return to. And the stars aligned and EUREKA, I got the job! There aren’t words to describe the trepidation I had walking into this new role. I had been sold a bill of goods not once, but twice before. I was not going to walk into another position with rose colored glasses on. 

    My first few weeks were great, I was learning so much and I was being exposed to multiple different facets of the company. I was introduced to the CEO and VPs within my first week, I was on a first name basis with the highest levels of leadership in the company and they truly seemed to listen to me when I talked to them. 

    At the end of my first month with the company, I went on business travel with the CEO, one of the VPs, and the Founder of the company – not only was it my first travel experience with this company but it was also with some of the most important people at the company. Unsurprisingly, I was nervous. Surprisingly, the trip was amazing. 

    I got to engage with leadership on a more personal level and they truly cared about what I had to say. The conversations I had on that trip are still referenced today and I am so thankful to have gone on this trip so early in my career with this company. I’ll never forget what was to me the most significant part of this trip. Following an employee engagement event we hosted for our local employees, we were heading back to the hotel and the CEO asked me “Do you know what your love language is?”. You could have knocked me over with a feather. Of course I knew, I’m a words of affirmation girl through and through. They noted this is something that my manager may struggle with as they’d not been great at it historically but they would keep that in mind. And they’ve kept that promise, to this day. 

    I got to engage with leadership on a more personal level and they truly cared about what I had to say.

    My manager, supposedly not historically superior with expressing their appreciation verbally, has had no difficulty in coming to me with praise. Any time they have feedback, they ensure it is being received correctly, something people struggle with on an interpersonal level, let alone a professional one. To put it simply: they care about me as a person first and an employee second. This has been the biggest differentiator between my new company and the previous. 

    I love my job, but on paper, I was slated to love my 2 previous jobs as well. The difficulty I was consistently faced with was my management, or lack thereof, and the environments I was trying to succeed in. It was like planting a petunia in a desert – I was destined to wilt from the start. 

    It’s been 6 months now and things are great. I’m not naïve enough to believe I will never have trouble with work – that is a part of life. But I know that I am supported by management and a team of some of the best, most kind hearted co-workers, and that knowledge makes the hardest of days that much easier to navigate.

    This blog was written by Guest Blogger Teddy Smith, a friend of Horizon Point.

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